YodaMamma MS & More

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Location: Crescent City, Fl, United States

I am 60, have MS, am an avid cook, love making candles (soy) and watching the endless parade of Nature outside my home. I treat the MS with supplements and LDN, I do not use any of the C.R.A.B. MS meds, we don't get along well. I was married for 13 years, we were together for 15. We are now divorced. Sad, that. I do still love him, but ONLY as the father of my baby. Better to keep it civil, hurts the child(ren) less that way, but is oh-so-hard to do sometimes.

Friday, July 30, 2010


I started telling you how I found out that me mother had died (and nobody thought to TELL me?) and then the very next day I found out that my sister had also died. A double whammy. I found out about her because I was googling mom to find her obit and found my sister's as well. Nice. Seems that the detective did try to find me but couldn't. Mom died Feb 7th, and Bev died March 2nd. We have now been to their house (they lived together) and found out that they were borderline hoarders. The place is a total mess, how could anyone LIVE that way? Papers, magazines, catalogs, clothes...piles and piles. Empty jewelry boxes scattered all over the floor. There is a car, a volvo, needs repair but only has 55k miles. Rob is here, he is helping (thank you Rob)(never thought I'd say THOSE words, let alone type them!). We also have to contend with having to move...well at least some of the furniture is good so I will have it in the new place (why do we have to move you ask....the landlady's daughter is moving here and she needs the place for her) Signed a lease yesterday. Rob's mom is "loaning" us a bed and there is a thrift shop nearby where we can get stuff on the cheap to fill in the "holes" Bev had several desks (I think they are nice, hard to tell under the piles of papers) there are also bookcases and some of those huge free-standing jewelry boxes (that must be where all the stuff from the empty ones went into). They both smoked like fiends so the place stinks SO bad your eyes water just walking in the place. At least the wooden furniture won't have absorbed the smell. The rest, though, is not salvageable, not the beds nor the couch...for one thing, the couch is where my sister's body was found *shudder* No, I do not want that in my home. And the piles of clothing will all be donated to goodwill, I hope they can get the smoke smell out, if I have to donate only clean clothing it will all have to be tossed instead, shame, there is some expensive clothing. I have my sisters purse, had to febreeze it but she did have, if maybe not GOOD taste, she had EXPENSIVE taste...her purse is by Dooney and Bourke, the wallet is a Fendi. I had to google them, I don't usually deal with designer things. The watch is Anne Klein, very pretty but I will never wear it, it had her blood on it. When my father died and we got his effects, HIS watch had blood on it, and now my sister's watch ALSO had blood? At least for this one Rob found his compassionate side and cleaned it for me. Thank you (AGAIN with the Thank youz?). That day was the hardest day I think of my life so far, the car has no a/c and we are in Fla, so we drove 4 hours in the heat, there is no electric at my sisters house so it was hot there and no water to drink there, we drank bottled water all day, kept having to stop and refill, I almost passed out from the heat, it got so bad I literally could not SEE. We were gone for 12 hours, 8 of them driving. Robbin was awesome, such a good boy. I love him so much.
So in the next few days we will move, then Rob will go down, get stuff from her house to my house with a u-haul, then he will clear out the house and get it ready for market (it will have to be painted) and when it is all said and done we'll sell it and I will give him some of the proceeds as payment (when it sells) for all of his hard work. The rest will go into a trust for Robbin.
Ok, now you might be wondering a few things, like, how is it that they died that long ago and I am only just now finding it all out? I haven't talked with them in 5 years. Why? Long story. Last time I saw Mom was November 11, 2001. She had been living with us, she was diabetic and incontinent and drank nothing but wine, coffee and scotch. All that alcohol has sugars that make the urine smell like you would not believe. She didn't smoke then, but the urine smell was an unforgettable stench that never went away and she and would wander around the house (yes, in front of Rob, Robbin, God and all) clad in NOTHING but a used depends. She had lost her sense of smell and refused to bathe. She peed her bed EVERY night (her long, stringy hair was yellow from it), every day I had to wash her soaked bedding and make her bed. It got to where I just could not do it anymore, taking care of her was a full time job and I also had a husband and a 4 year old child. So she went into a home. She resented it, so she put in a call to CPS and tried to have Robbin taken from me. In the letters I got from Bevs house, I read one, ONE, and that was the one where she talks about having Robbin taken from me and put in a foster home. I didn't and don't even want to look at the others, going to burn them unread, I don't need that stress. So, after my MOTHER tried to have my SON taken, I closed that door, locked it, boarded it over and cemented it (painted it over, too!). I called my sister, once (we were also estranged) about 5 years ago. In that call I found out that my older sister had died (gee thanks for telling me), and also that mom was now living with her (Bev) apparently Mom had told her all kinds of nasty things about me, untrue things, and she (of course) believed them. After we hung up, she waited a bit and called again, left a message on my machine full of the nastiest words you ever (do not) want to hear, and told me she never wanted to hear from me again. Fine by me! So, 5 years pass. It is almost my birthday, I am hoping that maybe time will have soothed the situation and Robbin can get to meet him aunt and grandmother, that is when I tried to call her and found out about the deaths.
Needless to say this is all almost surreal, I am surprised I haven't gone into a flair, I must be more resilient than I think I am.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Oh man. What now?

I wish I had the answer. Ok, my birthday is tomorrow, July 21st (also shared with Ernest Hemingway, Janet Reno, Don knotts and the phenomenal Robin Williams)
Damn. Give me a min.
ok, my sister and I have not talked for about 5-6 years. Nor have my mother and I. I can tell you why but that would involve talking bad of the dead..
Ok, so now you know, from that, a bit of what I am dealing with.
Last Sunday, hoping that my sis and I could finally come to terms, I called her number. Disconnected. So I google my uncle, and call him. He lets it slip that my mother is dead.I guess he thought I knew. I didn't.
Sorry, I cant' continue right now. More tomorrow