YodaMamma MS & More

heheheeee

2011-11-23T12:20:00.000-05:00

Ok

2011-11-23T01:56:00.002-05:00

Yeah, it has been a bit. Things are ok. Robbin is doing splendidly in school, running mostly A's, I couldn't be prouder. Day after tomorrow of Thanksgiving, it will be just us, instead of a big turkey I have a nice roasting chicken, will also make a Yorkshire Pudding, stuffing, green beans, corn...I also have a pumpkin pie...

On Sunday we will go to Rob's Mom's, Monday is his birthday so it is a general Thanksgiving/Birthday party. I will make a cake, that's my contribution.

Life here is so quiet, there is rarely much to blog about. I am still on LDN, still working well for me. I am also taking DE and recently started Iodine Protocol, so far so good.

My old PC died. It didn't owe me anything, it was about 7 years old. I got a new one, from the local PC store, he is letting me make payments bless his cotton sox. I am on it now, finally have Win7 lol...woohoo! Miss XP a bit, but I am sure soon Win7 will be familiar.

Bless all y'all, and Happy Thanksgiving!

I know

2011-08-21T12:23:00.002-05:00

I know it has been awhile, it has been both busy and quiet. Rob was here for a bit, brought Unkle Mikey with him, and also brought a new mommy kitty and her litter of FIVE, and dropped them off for ME to raise. Needless to say, my two were not exactly pleased about this. Neither was I. I love cats, but my two had achieved a good balance and going from two to EIGHT was a bit much. Not to mention how much food they went through, and litter!
Anyway, when they were old enough I found homes for 3 of them, and when they went back up N. Mike took the other two. HE has already found a home for one of them. I kept the mamma, so I can have her fixed. Rob was going to just drop her off at a farm, where she would have spent her short life spitting out kittens. I mean, her *first* litter, at under a year of age, and she has FIVE? She is a very sweet, tiny little soft calico.
While her was here Mike spent a few weeks visiting his sister in Tampa, while he was there he did me the HUGE favor of going to the funeral home and getting my sister's ashes. Rob had promised and promised he would do it, then when there was an actual opportunity to DO it, he said "I'm not doing it, I am done with this!" Nice. What if it was HIS sister? She had been there for over a year as it is..and he would have just let her stay there forever. Nice. thanks. So Mike got her for me, and now I have all three (mom and two sisters), need to figure out how to spread them on the water somewhere.
The other day my PC blew up, I am having to share Robbin's with him. When my SSI comes in next month I will get mine looked at, hopefully it can be saved, if not, well, hopefully something will sell on eBay and I can replace it. After all, it IS almost 7 years old and I spend probably 12-14 hours a day on it, poor thing doesn't owe me anything lol...I was playing something when the screen went blank and there was smoke coming out of the back...not a good sign, methinks...
Robbin is terrific, getting all A's and B's in school. Loves to ride his bike when he can, of course at this time of the year here in Florida it is way too hot, but soon it will be fall and he will be able to go out daily again.

re-post, because I think it is still relevant

2011-04-30T22:59:00.001-05:00

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Between Two Worlds

I feel as if I am living between two worlds. The world of Youth, and the world of Age. The world of Rock and the world of Symphony. The world of Health and the world of Wheelchair. The world of Safety and the world of Fear. The world of Abundance and the world of Lack. The world of the Teacher and the world of the Student. The world of the Elder and the world of the Innocent. I have done So much, led such a full and rich life, yet there is SO much yet to do, so many places yet to go, so much to teach, so much to learn. I never seem to know from one minute to another which world I will be in. I worry about bills, and money comes from unexpected places and the bills get paid. Dr's tell me I need all kinds of operations and medical assistances and yet I can walk and drive and shower standing up. I remember the things I used to be able to do and fear the loss of the things I retain. I am unsure of what to make for dinner and I open the freezer and find the answer. Why can I not find the answer to my other problems that easily? I look to the past and see who I was, and I look to the future and see who I want to be, and hope I can make it to be that person. I think of all the places I have been and want to take my family to, and I know I will not see those places again, and it sorrows me. Then I think of the things I retain, the things that so many people with MS cannot do, that I can still do, and I am glad I can do them, sad they can't. And I wonder for how much longer will I be able to do them? I have so many things working against me, the scholiosis, the arthritis, the MS, I should not be able to do anything but lie in bed and moan. And there have been times in my life that, there I was. But I have always gotten up, eventually, and walked. Nickname me Laz. I feel there is SO much still to do before I leave. I don't feel like I'm ready to dissolve into the pain, into the Light, not yet. I look out and I see my sweet son, 8 years old, and I wonder what the Hell I think I'm doing? How can I possibly take on the task of raising him the way he needs? Yet, day by day, I do it. Is God helping? Goddess? a Pantheon of unseen deities? I know I am not doing it alone, could not. It's too much. But I still do it, and the unseen hands still keep me from falling. And on the occasions that I DO fall, they help me to me feet. Again. Do I believe in God? Of course. Allow me to try to describe how *I* see God.
Imagine a Light. The light is made of millions of teeny little lights all clumped together. Every light is equal. Together they make the Light that I see as God. But there are millions of other lights all revolving, swirling, around the one Big Light. That is Us, the Incarnate ones. When we die, we go back into the Big Light, and when we are born, or re-born, we become separate but never disconnected from the Big Light. You see? We make up God, we Are God, but God is the creator of Us. God creates us, we create God. We are a part, not apart, of the Divinity, the Spark, that is God. Does this make sense? It does to me, I hope it does to you.

uummm

2011-04-03T14:46:00.002-05:00

so what's new with us? Not much, here in Florida the weather is sunny and warm (TOO warm most of the time lol) Rob has gone back up N with his latest victim, no idea if or when he will be back. Robbin and I are ok, Robbin is doing well at school, averaging a "b" grade, he's a good kid. He is about 5'5" now, towers over his 4'11-1/2" mommy *grin*.
The kitties are great, gotta somehow come up with the wherewithal to get the make fixed before he starts to spray...yukk...he IS adorable though, an awesome cat and getting better as he ages.
He is THE man of the house and takes his duties (as such) very seriously. Today is Sunday, garbage day (ohboyohboyohboy), in a little while I will clean out the ferret poop then the kitty litter. He helps me with the litter, then takes the bag or bags out to the curb for tomorrow's pickup. Never complains, just does it. an any mommy ask for a better kid? Methinks not. When we go to the store he helps me, especially with things out of my reach. Brings the bags in and helps me unpack and store. Never complains, ever. When it is bedtime, I tell him to go to bed and he does, no "aww ma!", just "click" and the lights and tv are off and his room is dark. And he sleeps through the night, always has. He is a deep sleeper, so if I linger up, watching tv or playing on the pc it doesn't bother him. He is going to make someone an awesome husband someday. He is SO not like his dad lol (had to be said, you know =)
In his defense (like I need to defend him?) he DID clean up my yard the other day before he left, bagged all the oranges and palm leaves for the garbage truck to take.
I am still thinking about taking him for child support, though.
Anyway, that's the latest...oh, did you hear about the dog in Japan they found on some floating debris, 3 weeks after the tsunami...alive? What an inspiring story...that dog deserves to be pampered for the rest of his days...puppy puppy....
Oh well, kitty litter awaits...

World Sorrow

2011-03-11T15:36:00.003-05:00

Wow, I an just reeling from what I have been watching...I first heard about Japan at about 4 a.m and watched CNN for the rest of the night, finally dozing off when it was already light outside, and now only a few hours later up again and still watching. The sheer power of the water is amazing and horrifying. Nothing can stand in front of it. The death toll will be huge. This is so horrible =(
My prayers go out to Japan and anyone else affected by this event. It almost seems wrong to be sitting in my nice home while their world is being destroyed. I know how Blessed I am to have it, I know that if the tsunami had hit Florida I would be dead and all of my loved ones as well, and that is a hard thought. I feel so sorry for the victims of this disaster.
As far as my MS goes, so far so good. I am, however, getting low on LDN and have no source to get more, so when these last three pills are dissolved and consumed, I don't know what I will do. I might have a source to get a script but if it costs a lot I won't be able to do it. As it is, we are running out of $ every month after the bills and the rent are paid, there is just not enough for things like LDN or anything for that matter. Rob is a total deadbeat, does NOT help at all. He was staying here and I had to ask him to go as I could not afford to feed him, all I asked him to do was replace what he used/ate, or buy groceries and contribute a bit toward utilities, he refused and moved in with his mother...and PAYS HER RENT!!! So, he will help his Mother (who has quite a bit of $$) but will not help me keep a roof over HIS SON'S head? I think my only option at this point will be to try and get an atty and go for court appointed child support. I need some help, I am raising Robbin all on my own. Rob gets to see him whenever he wants but not help raise him? How does he qualify for that? And he owes me $$ but doesn't pay it back, and I really need it.
Sorry if I am going off on a tangent, I am just so sad and angry about so many things. I love Robbin so much, he is such a delight and such a good boy and he deserves SO much better from his dad. As do I.

I see I have not posted in awhile

2011-02-10T17:07:00.003-05:00

I am doing well, still on LDN. Robbin is with me, and happy, doing his homeschool classes and maintaining a B average. Rob lives nearby, with his mom. We are getting along well at this time. Nothing romantic, not with him and unfortunately not with anyone else. *sigh* I miss it, having someone to shall we say, snuggle? with. Maybe someday. Meantime, life goes on. Here in Fla we are having good weather, watching the rest of the country with the snow and the storms and being glad we are here where the weather is clement.
The new kitty is a handfull, he can be the sweetest kitty and the most infuriating kitty I have ever had. He sleeps next to my pillow every night and is SO sweet, jumps up in my lap when I sit on the bed and purrs and looks up at me with total adoration on his face. But by day! I swear this kitty is Jekyl and Hyde! By day her is a holy terror! If he can get into it, he gets into it, Don't DARE leave ANY kind of food that he might like (i.e chicken,meat,fish,pasta,rice...BREAD...you get the idea) anywhere he can get to it. If I buy a loaf of bread it had better be put away IMMEDIATELY or he will get into it and eat it. Word! He is a terror! If it can be knocked off where I have put it, down it goes. He is such a handful!!! I love to pieces but sometimes I just want to make him an outside kitty!!! =)

Hey

2010-12-01T13:07:00.002-05:00

I know it has been awhile. Things are relatively quiet, Rob is living nearby with his family, Robbin and I are happy together. He just turned 13, Rob's sister got him a BIKE! He didn't know how to ride at the time but he learned within a day or two and now he goes out 3-4 times a day and dues a turn around the park. It's pretty safe here, nobody but us old folk...many of the homes here are only occupied on the weekends, during the week it is really quiet, and on the weekends the busiest place is the marina at the end of the street. Most of the road traffic is golf carts and 4-wheelers.
We have a new kitten, he's basically a rescue. He is everything a kitten should be, adorably cute, friendly, loving, funny...he bedevils poor Razzie, makes her play even hen she doesn't want to. They are both black & white so he's a little mini-me for her. I'll post a pic of them both.
I am going to start a blog with information about scammers, I'll post where it is as soon as it's ready.

Salt Lamps ~ Awesome!!!!

2010-10-01T00:13:00.000-05:00

">Awesome!

2010-08-21T10:28:00.000-05:00

Presented by: Medical Assistant

Well

2010-08-18T12:21:00.002-05:00

We're moved, the new place is ok. Rob was able to make a trip to my sisters house and get some stuff, I am now broke, it cost me more then I could comfortably afford (oh I have food money but that's about it), however, I now have a nice pecan dining room table (with 4 matching chairs) and a Massive HD TV, I think it weighs about #250-#300 (I DID say "massive", did I not?), it sits in what was her living room coffee table, takes up the whole thing, good thing is it a solid table, and low to the ground. The TV is 25" high x 42" wide ( the screen is 19"x33") and you can see the pores on the people (NOT always a pretty sight, especially for those of us who like medical shoes...ugh!). There is more but it is still in Rob's mom's garage. Can't seem to get him motivated to go get it for me, though I have asked...and asked. As usual, he will do it when he is damned good and ready. He has always been like that, so it's nothing new...frustrating, but not new. Still, I do appreciate him getting it at least that far. and will appreciate it a whole helluva lot more when he goes, not the extra mile, but the LAST mile! His mom's place is about 3 miles from here, BTW.
Next Tuesday the landlord will be finishing the ramp, so I will be able to go OUT in my chair! YAAY! Now all I have to do is get my hands on a golf cart...(the standard mode of transport locally).
Robbin is fine, he is such a good kid, not to mention a wonderful son and a light to me, a reason to get up in the morning (especially since he comes in and wakes me when he gets up...). I just love him so much, and he loves his mommy =)

Ok (VERY LONG!)

2010-07-30T11:10:00.003-05:00

I started telling you how I found out that me mother had died (and nobody thought to TELL me?) and then the very next day I found out that my sister had also died. A double whammy. I found out about her because I was googling mom to find her obit and found my sister's as well. Nice. Seems that the detective did try to find me but couldn't. Mom died Feb 7th, and Bev died March 2nd. We have now been to their house (they lived together) and found out that they were borderline hoarders. The place is a total mess, how could anyone LIVE that way? Papers, magazines, catalogs, clothes...piles and piles. Empty jewelry boxes scattered all over the floor. There is a car, a volvo, needs repair but only has 55k miles. Rob is here, he is helping (thank you Rob)(never thought I'd say THOSE words, let alone type them!). We also have to contend with having to move...well at least some of the furniture is good so I will have it in the new place (why do we have to move you ask....the landlady's daughter is moving here and she needs the place for her) Signed a lease yesterday. Rob's mom is "loaning" us a bed and there is a thrift shop nearby where we can get stuff on the cheap to fill in the "holes" Bev had several desks (I think they are nice, hard to tell under the piles of papers) there are also bookcases and some of those huge free-standing jewelry boxes (that must be where all the stuff from the empty ones went into). They both smoked like fiends so the place stinks SO bad your eyes water just walking in the place. At least the wooden furniture won't have absorbed the smell. The rest, though, is not salvageable, not the beds nor the couch...for one thing, the couch is where my sister's body was found *shudder* No, I do not want that in my home. And the piles of clothing will all be donated to goodwill, I hope they can get the smoke smell out, if I have to donate only clean clothing it will all have to be tossed instead, shame, there is some expensive clothing. I have my sisters purse, had to febreeze it but she did have, if maybe not GOOD taste, she had EXPENSIVE taste...her purse is by Dooney and Bourke, the wallet is a Fendi. I had to google them, I don't usually deal with designer things. The watch is Anne Klein, very pretty but I will never wear it, it had her blood on it. When my father died and we got his effects, HIS watch had blood on it, and now my sister's watch ALSO had blood? At least for this one Rob found his compassionate side and cleaned it for me. Thank you (AGAIN with the Thank youz?). That day was the hardest day I think of my life so far, the car has no a/c and we are in Fla, so we drove 4 hours in the heat, there is no electric at my sisters house so it was hot there and no water to drink there, we drank bottled water all day, kept having to stop and refill, I almost passed out from the heat, it got so bad I literally could not SEE. We were gone for 12 hours, 8 of them driving. Robbin was awesome, such a good boy. I love him so much.
So in the next few days we will move, then Rob will go down, get stuff from her house to my house with a u-haul, then he will clear out the house and get it ready for market (it will have to be painted) and when it is all said and done we'll sell it and I will give him some of the proceeds as payment (when it sells) for all of his hard work. The rest will go into a trust for Robbin.
Ok, now you might be wondering a few things, like, how is it that they died that long ago and I am only just now finding it all out? I haven't talked with them in 5 years. Why? Long story. Last time I saw Mom was November 11, 2001. She had been living with us, she was diabetic and incontinent and drank nothing but wine, coffee and scotch. All that alcohol has sugars that make the urine smell like you would not believe. She didn't smoke then, but the urine smell was an unforgettable stench that never went away and she and would wander around the house (yes, in front of Rob, Robbin, God and all) clad in NOTHING but a used depends. She had lost her sense of smell and refused to bathe. She peed her bed EVERY night (her long, stringy hair was yellow from it), every day I had to wash her soaked bedding and make her bed. It got to where I just could not do it anymore, taking care of her was a full time job and I also had a husband and a 4 year old child. So she went into a home. She resented it, so she put in a call to CPS and tried to have Robbin taken from me. In the letters I got from Bevs house, I read one, ONE, and that was the one where she talks about having Robbin taken from me and put in a foster home. I didn't and don't even want to look at the others, going to burn them unread, I don't need that stress. So, after my MOTHER tried to have my SON taken, I closed that door, locked it, boarded it over and cemented it (painted it over, too!). I called my sister, once (we were also estranged) about 5 years ago. In that call I found out that my older sister had died (gee thanks for telling me), and also that mom was now living with her (Bev) apparently Mom had told her all kinds of nasty things about me, untrue things, and she (of course) believed them. After we hung up, she waited a bit and called again, left a message on my machine full of the nastiest words you ever (do not) want to hear, and told me she never wanted to hear from me again. Fine by me! So, 5 years pass. It is almost my birthday, I am hoping that maybe time will have soothed the situation and Robbin can get to meet him aunt and grandmother, that is when I tried to call her and found out about the deaths.
Needless to say this is all almost surreal, I am surprised I haven't gone into a flair, I must be more resilient than I think I am.

Oh man. What now?

2010-07-20T19:03:00.002-05:00

I wish I had the answer. Ok, my birthday is tomorrow, July 21st (also shared with Ernest Hemingway, Janet Reno, Don knotts and the phenomenal Robin Williams)
Damn. Give me a min.
ok, my sister and I have not talked for about 5-6 years. Nor have my mother and I. I can tell you why but that would involve talking bad of the dead..
Ok, so now you know, from that, a bit of what I am dealing with.
Last Sunday, hoping that my sis and I could finally come to terms, I called her number. Disconnected. So I google my uncle, and call him. He lets it slip that my mother is dead.I guess he thought I knew. I didn't.
Sorry, I cant' continue right now. More tomorrow

Trip

2010-05-30T15:14:00.003-05:00

Well we got a car, an awesome one at that...Rob bought the neighbor's mom's 1990 Cadillac Deville, it is the coupe version and is totally cherry. Looks like new, no rust, bangs or dings. Black and shiny. He has gone off in it to Herkimer to dig stones for a few weeks, visiting Mike in Hagerstown on the way. Robbin and I are all alone here, I am stocked up with supplies and can have whatever I need delivered from Alice.com or from Schwans.com, plus there is a local taxi who can take me and my chair to town if I need something that can't be delivered. So we're good, for as long as Rob wants to be gone. It is nice and quiet. Being Florida of course there is the daily thunderstorms lol...I do love a good storm! Funny thing is cooking with just Robbin and I, I am cooking about 1/2 of what I do when Rob is here, so I am saving on groceries lol...bigtime!
Example...last night I made Schwans Mediterranean veggie mix with sauteed kielbasa and curly fries. I normally would have to use the entire package of both the fried and the veg, whereas last night I made 1/2 and there was plenty (and it was good...the kielbasa flavor was perfect with the veggies!) so I can actually make the same dinner another time instead of it all going into one meal. Nice. Oh I don't mind cooking huge meals, but it is nice to be able to make the groceries last a bit longer...
Robbin's schooling is going splendidly. Here in Fl. there is something called the FLVS (Florida Virtual School) and that is where he is learning. It is really wonderful, he IS homeschooled (so there is no bullying or gangs, and the local schools are well known for both), he will be getting socialization whenever Rob drags his carc@$$ back, they will be joining the local "Y", meantime in school he has classes that he can complete whenever he wants, there are teachers for every course, with special online "rooms" with tutors for every subject. His teachers are also always available via telephone or email. They seem very committed to his education, all I have to do really is monitor his work and help whenever I can, and if he comes up with something I can't answer he can go into the "room" and get instruction, there is always someone there, usually at least 2-3 tutors and 1-2 teachers. It is really quite impressive and very well thought-out. In other stated I was completely on my own, here there is more help then I could have ever dreamed!

Wow,

2010-04-14T13:51:00.002-05:00

Has it been a year already? Today if the one-year anniversary of Rob and my divorce. D-day, as it were. For dinner I am making BBQ ribs, baked beans, collard greens and maybe a Jonny-cake. Celebratory, if you will.
Almost daily. No, not almost. Daily, I hear from Robbin (and often Rob) about things they hated and/or resented about living with *her*. I have to keep telling him that they are miles away and that era is over, not to be repeated. Some of the things are what you or I might consider minor, but they apparently really rankled Robbin. Like the water. Apparently the house had some fairly nasty water, and *she* had a Brita water pitcher and would not let Robbin drink the water from it, and she also had a small fridge in her bedroom filled with individual water bottles and she wouldn't let him have them. Small to you or I, but to him, Huge. And I think very selfish, why would she make my son drink the nasty water and not let him have good water? She who said she loved him SOOO much...Yeah, so I see.
And I hear a lot about her daughter. Now, her daughter is gay. Nothing wrong with that. But what IS wrong is the daughter going about with a shirt on that reads "I eat pussy like a fat kid eats cake" Now THAT is wrong on more levels then I care to go into. And she ALLOWED it? In front of my very impressionable child? I have to keep telling MYSELF that it is over and he will never have to see that again.
SO, on to better things...
I love living here, soon I hope to have renewed my driver's license and have something decent to drive, then I will be out and about again YAAAYYY! I also want a golf cart, I SO want to go fishing with Robbin and to go around the area, there is so much to see and do and I want to see it all and DO it all. I also can't WAIT till I have a few bucks in my account that I can spend taking Robbin to Epcot. That has been my dream for YEARS, I never thought it would be possible, and now it IS possible! And it WILL happen..and soon! I know it!
So yeah, it has been a year, and quite a year I must say! Can't wait to see what comes next *grin*

Well well well...

2010-04-02T19:08:00.000-05:00

On March 12th I got a call from Rob. He was asking directions to my place. He had, apparently, left *her* and was coming back to me(with Robbin, of course). So what do you do when your ex shows up on a rainy Pa night, with your son...asking "Can we come in?" You open your arms and bring them in, dry them off and feed them. So that is what I did.
Within a week we had all moved lock, stock, and pets to Florida. We are now renting a really lovely home, we have two living rooms, one formal, one more of a family room, formal dining room, kitchen with island, 3 Br (we each have our own, I have the big one) 2 full bathrooms (one off my room, the guys share the other one), fenced-in back yard, little pond with fountain in the front yard, fully furnished! And the rent includes high-speed Internet, dishTV, electric, water, phone, central heat/air (and every room has a ceiling fan), big windows and lots of them! So we only have ONE bill to pay! And it is very affordable!!! The landlady is a peach, really nice woman, a few years younger then me, I guarantee we will end up friends!
Rob's mom and sister live nearby, I really have nothing to do with them, and that suits me just fine. Rob and I are not "together" per se, other then occasionally being under the same roof (he will be spending most of his time with his family, living there and only staying in his Br here on occasion, using that more as an office then a bedroom) and THAT suits me just fine as well. I have NO desire to remarry him, there is still too much water under that bridge. But he is trying to regain my trust, he knows he did the wrong thing, over and over, he is trying to make amends, but that will take time, lots of time, if ever. Meanwhile, Robbin is delirious with joy at being back with Mommy.
And while I *am* sorry that *she* is now in the same boat, and feeling the SAME pain that she caused ME, it is proof that Karma does indeed exist...and WILL bite you in the @$$...she should NOT have broken my marriage and stolen my son. She tried to buy them, buying them whatever they wanted, rewarding bad behavior with goodies, and hopefully now she has learned that you really truly can NOT buy love, only rent it for a time....I know, only too well, the pain, the hurt, the loss. I am sorry she is going through it, but I didn't cause it and cannot stop it. I am grateful to her for taking good care of my baby for the time she did. I am a bit dismayed, though, at how Robbin refers to her as a "female Mussolini", apparently she has some control issues and made him profoundly unhappy on many levels (and Rob as well). Well, all of that is now over, my son is happy, Rob is working his @$$ off with readings and has basically signed Robbin over to me (we went to the SSA office and he signed OFF on custody of Robbin), life is good again. No romance, but I don't really miss it (at least right now, maybe in the future...and maybe with another man). Rob knows he is free to go with whomsoever he wants, as am I. We are, after all, divorced (will be a year on the 14th!).
Yesterday was April Fool's day...which was:
The 13th anniversary of me finding out that I was pregnant.
The 6th anniversary of my finding out that I have MS, and
My cats 6th birthday (yes, she was born the same day I got my Dx.)
Only thing of note to happen this April Fool's day was me finding a blazingly silver hair on ROBBIN. He thought it was an April Fool's joke until I brought out a mirror...
So there is the update y'all have been waiting for lol...
Oh, one more thing...my blog seems to have attracted the attention of scammers, who leave "comments" pushing something (always signed "anonymous")...I am trying to delete those comments as quickly as they appear, I apologize for the spam. Please don't let that deter you from leaving legitimate comments (which will not be deleted).
You can also email me directly at yodamamma@gmail.com. That is not my primary email address but I do check it daily.

That's what I get...

2010-01-11T17:20:00.005-05:00

for going out without telling my "handlers" (i.e. neighbor)
On Sat the 3rd. I got to go see Robbin (YAAY!!) I actually had the temerity to go OUT without trotting it against Em. Actually, I DID tell her, but she forgot!.
Now, there is a person I met, a guy named Russ, who has become a friend (not THAT type of friend, more like a brother). Shortly after I left for Philly, he decided to swing by. Knock-knock, no answer. Hmmm, Well maybe she's gone to the store...a few hours later, Russ again, knock-knock, no answer. Panic sets in. Where IS she? He goes over to Em's. Where IS she? "I don't know! Panic redoux. She phones. You got it, no answer. So what does she do? Call 911! The paramedics come, the cops come, get down and peer under the door (there is a gap big enough I don't know why they didn't just crawl under) they see the wheels of my chair (when I go out, as in, in someone's car, I use the walker) but they don't see ME. So they try a bunch of keys. Nada. So they go get some sort of thingy that pops the lock (not breaks, just opens) and come in. Cat is here. Ferrets are here. She is not here! So one of them says " could she have gone to see someone" and POOF! Their collective brain cell kicks in and Em remembers that I was going to go see Robbin!. So they lock the door and go. Russ leaves a note (I am worried, call me!).
I get home, notice that the cat is acting squirrely...see the note, and see that my phone is blinking. I call Em back and she fills me in on the high-jinks. Then I call Russ and assure him that I am, indeed, ok.
So I guess if something DID happen to me, the cavalry is right across the hall...gives me a bit of a warm, fuzzy feeling to know that they care...of course Razzie (the cat) didn't forgive me till bed-time

Ho-Ho-Ho

2009-12-25T14:47:00.000-05:00

Just wanted to drop in and say Merry Christmas!

I know, I know, it has been awhile

2009-12-22T20:35:00.003-05:00

I am now ensconced in my "new" apartment (been here since Sept). It is ok, I have huge windows, the apartment itself is nice, warm, and in a good area of town...safe...the courthouse is near, the police station very close, City Hall is caddy-corner...in other words, about as safe an area as can be. And there are cameras at the entrance of the building, and you have to know the key-code or someone in the building to even get into the lobby. So, I am safe. And if Robbin were here, he would also be safe. I miss him. I will not go into all of that right now, except that I love him and miss him and he is still my world. And always will be.
I have "met" a nice man online, we talk every day, he buys me nice things (mails them to me), and sends me nice things for Robbin, like the $150 pulsar watch he sent Robbin for his birthday. I know, too many "nice"'s in that sentence. But he is. Nice. He tells me he loves me, all of the time. I tell him he needs to MEET me before he can make that judgment.
I have also met my neighbor, a very lovely person named Em. She has a daughter, 19, who really needs to learn some respect and manners. She is basically ok, but she has no respect, and her manners, well, don't get me started. She (Em) is 51, and has a son, 11. Her son is with his father, so we have a lot in common, and spend a lot of time crying together and missing our children. She helps me when she can, I help her when I can. Example, with the recent snowfall, I could not get to the store. So she went for me, with my list, and yesterday she was here, told me she has very little food, and no TP, so when she went to her apartment for something, when she got back there was a bag of huge chicken legs and a roll of TP on the chair she sits in. Neighbor helping neighbor. I have plenty of food, lots of frozen chicken, beef and even some pork chops, more then I will eat, so I gave her some.
Talked with Robbin tonight, it had been since last Friday, not that I haven't called, every day, sometimes several times. But I had not had a call back, or an answer, till today. He is ok. He misses me, I miss him. I hope to get him back soon. What Rob is doing is not justified in any way, shape or form. Karma, baybee....

2009-10-29T23:31:00.000-05:00

Robbin's 12th Birthday!

sigh

2009-09-21T01:07:00.003-05:00

I STILL haven't heard from Robbin. In his entire LIFE I have never ever gone more then 2-3 days without talking to him, and that only in the last year. Before Rob stole him he was never away from me, not in his whole life. And now that bastard has not let me talk to him in TWO WEEKS. I don't know if he is ok, where he is, how he is, why they're telling him he can't call me. I have sent him email after email and they go unopened. We go to court in 10 days. Wish me luck, I want my baby back!!!

Well

2009-09-08T11:58:00.002-05:00

I have moved. I like the apartment, the location is safe (police on one corner, town hall caddy-corner) the neighborhood is clean and mostly hispanic, which suits me just fine, having lived in Spain for 10 years. Today I ventured out and found a grocery store that takes EBT and has a "carniceria" (meat shop) where I got a package with chicken wings, legs, ground beef, some kind of little meat chunk (would be good in stew, or quickly pan fried and added to a casserole or a sauce over rice or noodles), he added a package of hot dogs and a big bag of taters...for $19.99!! They also have a whole isle of Goya stuff so as far as groceries I'm good to go there...yaay!
I am also about 2 blocks from the Sovereign Center, where they do sports and concerts...which will be a blast because I'll hear EVERYTHING!
Tonight they have the Americal Idol tour, and on Fri or Sat they have...get this...Journey and Heart!!! WOOHOO!!! I have seen Journey in concert, and if I recall correctly I should get a contact high from here rofl...then on the 20th...ZZ Top!!! so it looks like living here will be full of adventures, certainly not quiet little Florence, or Chester...Chester was not quiet. Here won't be quiet either but I think I'll somehow manage to live with it (Heart!!! I Love Heart!!!)
Now, the bad stuff...Rob didn't bring Robbin this weekend. No reason, no excuse. Just didn't bring him. Oh yes, you betcha I have a call in to the atty. I called the police there where they are but would you believe they CLOSE for the weekend? WTF??? So that was no help. I'm going to ask my atty if I should call them again now that they're open, even though it is past the weekend. And they are going against another part of the court order and NOT letting Robbin call me when he wants, I did not talk to him or hear from him from Wed. till last night, and then they cut off the call mid-sentence...bastards...Karma, my dears...Karma...they think they are above the laws of Man and of God and of Karma...they are not, and I will be more then happy to assist in their discovery of that fact...
I miss Robbin so much, it hurts so bad when I don't hear from him, the worst is not seeing him, not knowing what he's up to, where he is. I just want to hug him again...my baby...

My Boyo

2009-08-24T01:11:00.001-05:00

He is with me but at this time only on weekends, I am working to remedy that, Rob has an atty and now so do I. I am also in the process of moving, having *finally* located an affordable apartment, it is in Reading, about 70 miles away but well within the 150 miles the divorce agreement stipulates. I am SO pissed at Rob though, it is Robbin's school break and he won't let him stay with me for more then the "usual" weekend. That sucks. There is no reason for it, just to hurt me, and not giving a good hot damn that he is ALSO hurting Robbin. But then he never does, it is all about HIM and what HE wants and when HE wants it, it is not about me, unless it is to hurt me (and what the HELL did I do to make him hate me? I was faithful and honest, and he can't stand that. He is a pathological LIAR and I have proof of that. Oh and it will all come out in court. And do you think the courts are going to like his little games? Assuredly Not.)
Meanwhile Robbin did something so cute last weekend...he said "Mom, can I pamper you?" I said sure hon, what do you have in mind? He said he wanted to do my nails!! Well, I have acrylics on (I do them myself) and so he decided to do my toenails instead (paint them, the fingernails were already done, and in the same polish he'd chosen!) So he sat cross-leged on the floor in front of me, gently took each foot in turn and did the nails...and did a good job, to boot! What a sweet boy he is!
One problem I am having is they apparently don't believe in manners at Cathy's, because Robbin's manners have gone into the crapper. Every weekend I have to remind him to use his manners. Every weekend! Everything I do they undo during the week. I am trying to raise him to be mannered, that is the way I was raised (Rob aparently also was not, he still chews with his mouth open), I know that if he goes out into the world with his manners intact he stands a much better chance of getting somewhere and not having his hiney handed to him on a platter...yet another reason I want primary custody. I want to give Robbin every chance at success possible.

wow

2009-06-17T03:56:00.003-05:00

Wow, I'm here. Life is SO totally different it's hard to even describe. The first, biggest and best change is that I get to be with my baby again. Gods but I missed him! He is tall and strong and healthy and awesome. And I get him for the summer break, a whole two 1/2 weeks! Starting today! Hopefully sometime we'll be able to arrange some activities, he wants to go to the King of Prussia Mall, not sure about that, if they don't have handicap chairs available, no can do. Maybe we can go to bingo? I know he loves that...I have had him here on weekends (2 so far) and now I'll *really* get to make up for lost time!
Living here is, well...hectic? Noisy? All of the above? And sometimes none of the above, they are very good parents and their kids, for the sheer number of them, are amazingly quiet (except for mealtimes lol)

Well...

2009-06-01T14:16:00.003-05:00

It looks like the big move is ON! He has his ticket, I have the truck reserved, I have called and arranged for services to be turned off, just have to remember to do an address change and I'm jake! I can't WAIT to se my baby again!

Susan Boyle

2009-05-25T12:16:00.004-05:00

Well, she's gone and done it again, moved me to tears and goosebumps. This time she sang "Memories" (from "Cats"). When she first started, the nerves were apparent, she even wavered in the first few lines, and wasn't really in her comfort zone. But...when she hit the words "every street lamp" she entered her zone, you could SEE it. And when she hit that high note...."touch me..." the goosebumps almost made me look like a prickly-pear cactus! I Love her!!! And I SO SO SO agree with what Piers said! And she showed some of her humor during Simon's comment *grin* She is a star! No question about it!
Now, I want to hear her sing "You raise me up" you know, the song that Josh Groban sings...(I love him, too, BTW...awesome young man!)
Link: Susan Boyle Enjoy!

OK

2009-05-22T12:45:00.002-05:00

Yeah, yeah, I know it has been awhile. But there's really been nothing *new* to talk about. It's not like you don't KNOW how much I miss Robbin and how hard I've been trying to get down there, why berate you with more of the same?
Well it looks like there might finally be some good news...seems a long-time friend of mine, a lady I've known online for years, lives right around the corner from where I need to be to be with Robbin. And she, kind soul that she is, has offered to let me stay with her and her brood (she has 6 children, 2 cats, a dog, and a husband. In no particular order.) while I home seek from there. The benefits are obvious for both of us, she gets a live-in babysitter with huge maternal instincts and who will pay a little gelt in her direction, and I get a place to stay close enough to be able to have weekends with my sweet son, and even dinner during the week (at least once), plus a place where I can use as command central to find a real home for Robbin and I, something that is darned hard from 1,100 miles away. Her hubby is planning on flying in at the beginning of June (dates/times/reservations yet to be cemented) getting a moving van and coming here, getting me, Razziecat and the pig (as in guinea) and hauling our a$$et$ down there. I *should* be there by the 5th or so of June. *heaves great big sigh of relief* Now, we ARE in Mercrograde, so I'm not saying anything for sure just yet, but it seems that I Will, if all goes well and the crick don' rise, be with my Robbin soon. Prayers please toward a smooth and easy move.

Susan Boyle

2009-04-17T14:14:00.002-05:00

I saw her interviewed the other morning, and I really have a bit of a bone to pick with the interviewers...they're making fun of her because she isn't a raving beauty, and because of her little dance and the never-been-kissed thing. Now, these ladies are all beautiful, successful and married. They absolutely know NOTHING about being plain, or being picked on and bullied. In their insensitive way they are also bullying her. Not that they mean to, they just have no basis for comparison to get into HER head. She is, romantically, as unplucked as her eyebrows, that in today's society that is such a rarity (the romance, not the 'brows, which BTW are coming back into fashion...she just didn't know she is ahead of the pack).
What *I* want to hear in the way of questions has nothing to do with whether she has been romantically involved or not (none of my business) but about her singing! I want to know if she's ever taken singing lessons, if she practices, what her favorite genre of music is...I know she's been singing since she was 12, is she totally self-taught? Her vocal control is awesome, her vibrato extraordinary, she uses it lightly, some singers SO overuse it, she uses it to amplify but not excessively. I know she took acting lessons, had she ever sung onstage before? How did she do it? She went out there and took total control, one would have thought she was a pro. I don't give a fig about her romance or her dance, it's cute but she was also very nervous...and who can blame her? But the second she launched into song and blew the crowd away, she took total control...a beautiful thing to see...and a blow to all the "perfect people" out there who relish judging people like us, the not-so-pretty, not-so-young, not-so-svelte and not-so-perfect women (and men!). YES, we not-so-perfect people CAN and WILL surprise you, we ARE worthy, and are tired of being downtrodden!! HUZZAH for the Susan Boyle's of the world!!!

Well, today is the big D

2009-04-14T06:37:00.003-05:00

yes, today the divorce is final. And of course, today in History was the day the titanic hit the iceberg...Oh, and I have to be in court at 10:a.m., so what is on TV at 10:a.m? Well, Divorce Court, of course!! SO,I'm not going to dwell on that, but instead comment some more on the Billy Mays Craze...
Seems he is going to *gasp*thud* have his own TV show. Yea, like we don't get yelled at enough by the man, now this! At LEAST it isn't co-starring the Shamwow man, who I think cut his fame short when he slap-chopped the hooker, who seems to have bitten more then his lip, but nipped his career in the bud. No loss. All he needs to do is invest the loot he got and retire to an island...far, far away....
Anyway back to Billy. New show is called The Pitchmen. My version has a *B* instead of a *P*, because he makes the ads we all bitch about...HE apparently does have a co-"star", the guy with the strange accent. Not a traditional British accent, nor is it Auzzie or NZ, so I call it British-ish. What it basically is, is annoying. Have you figured out yet two things...one, I am not fond of pitch-men, and, two, I watch WAAAY too much TV.
What ever happened to Ron Pompeii? At least he had imagination and his stuff was always a bit quirky...I mean, scrambling the egg in the shell? Like my fork doesn't do it well enough? And he sold gazillions of the things! True genius...abhorrent, but genius...
NOW, I want you to go to this link and prepare to be amazed. Absolutely amazed. No joke.

Out of the mouths....

2009-04-08T16:30:00.003-05:00

Robbin is here, has been since Sunday. The visit is going wonderfully! We are both SO happy, he comes up and hugs and kisses me all of the time, he is SO happy he glows...and he has grown! He is now taller then I am and wearing size 7 shoes!!! And eats like it, too...
During his last week there he went to a school play with Cathy. It was Jesus Christ Superstar, which has always been one of my very favorite movies...so since he enjoyed it so much, I got the DVD off eBay. Well we're watching it right now...and within the first few minuted he said "It's like a Cristian version of High School Musical" I am still chortling about that....

April 1

2009-04-01T16:47:00.003-05:00

April Fool's Day. I have quite the history with this date, on April 1 1997 I found out that I was (at 42) pregnant. And on April 1 2004 I got the diagnosis of MS. So it is a very mixed-feeling day. And it is also now 13 days before the divorce is final.
Yesterday Robbin called, I was hurting, big-time, and was crying. The pain was both physical and emotional. I am SO sorry he heard me crying. When I cry, I cannot talk, just can't, words will NOT come out. SO I was not able to tell him why, when he asked. So he said "It's ok Mommy, I will be seeing you face-to-face real soon" What a sweet boy. I just love him SO much. Just a few more days.
Meantime, here's a thought...the shamwow guy. he has another commercial, equally obnoxious, where he sells something called the slapchop. In it he says, and I quote, "you're gonna love my nuts". Well apparently he was sharing his nuts, and got arrested, for slapping a prostitute. So he really does love his product...the slap part anyway...Now, on the subject of annoying TV ad guys, think Billy Mays. Now think Sex. Can you even imagine Billy Mays selling sex toys? Or ANY sex product? Viagra? Condoms? Instead of yelling about the aweswome auger he would be yelling about the daring dildo. And can you imagine him having sex? A comedian could hit pure gold with a routine about that! I wonder if he can evel *talk* without shouting?
I twitter now. Did you know Twitter is one of the Seven Signs of the Apocalyps? And HULU is another? We're doomed....

Counting

2009-03-21T17:06:00.002-05:00

Just kinda counting the days now...2 weeks to go, then I will have my sweetiepie back in my big mommy hugging arms. Robbin is counting them, too, he really misses his Mommy.
Apparently they had a pizza&bingo day at his school today and if I got it right, my baby won three times! I have always been lucky at Bingo, guess he comes by it honestly. I SO wish I could have been there with him. It seems the entire Philly contingent went lol...
I've already started packing for the move. Don't have a clue where I'll land but since I only have Reigna a few hours a week (the lady who comes and cleans my home) I figured it best to get a jump start on the process.

Today

2009-03-11T23:16:00.003-05:00

Today I joined Twitter
And made a new Yahoo group, for networking.
Talked to Robbin, he asks daily how my WoW toons are doing, he has been waiting for me to reach level 55 so I can make him a Death Knight, and today I did. He won't know about it till tomorrow, but I know he will be excited. I named it after him. Well, sorta, after his nickname.
The other day he told me that if he had a car he would get a bumper sticker that said "My Mom has MS". And yesterday he said that he wants to find a cure for MS, no matter what it takes, no matter how dangerous. Then just as I was getting all verklempt, came the reality check...he said "I hope it doesn't kill you, but if it does, look on the bright side, no more MS!" *thud* Only, and I mean ONLY, a kiddo could come up with that...it is very intense for him, my having MS. I really wish I could just wish it away, I know if HE could it would have been gone a long time ago. One silver lining to MS is the children of MS parents tend to be more compassionate, and the would certainly could benefit from more compassion. Robbin has always been my gentle giant (he is, at 11, as tall as I am) and he is showing strong signs of becoming a compassionate person.

Well

2009-03-05T15:35:00.002-05:00

OK, we have a date. The divorce will be final April 14th @10:a.m. So there's a crash diet for you, I lose 200# and he loses (well, I'm not saying how many)#'s with the stroke of a pen. Strange thing is a good friend of mine just told me that HER divorce was also final on April 14th! What are the odds?
Meanwhile, the older gentleman from across the hall started hitting on me yesterday! In the time I have been here I doubt we've exchanged 2 dozen words, and suddenly he's all chatty, telling me all about his 2 marriages, his upcoming (71st) birthday, his favorite fishing spots, and, oh yes, how MUCH he likes me with Blonde hair!

Spring. yeah, riiiight

2009-02-27T14:30:00.000-05:00

Avon and stuff

2009-02-24T12:44:00.004-05:00

Ok, I confess, I have become an Avon Lady. I like saving money, and might even make a buck or two. I had sent for some mineral make-up (you know the kind, you see their infomercials all day every day). While the product is nice, the price is outrageous, and when you order the trial, you're automatically "enrolled" in their "plan", Their plan is, sending you $50 of products every month or so. But you know what REALLY ticked me off? When they send you the regular shipment, there is no blush (what they call "warmth") so either you spend even MORE money and but it seperately, or you look like a ghost. Well I found that Avon has the SAME stuff, at less then 1/2 of the price, and you order it when YOU WANT it, it does not come automatically nor does it cost you $50 a month. AND they have more variety in their colors, even have a lovely smoky plum duo eyeshadow, that looks absolutely awesome on me :-)
And the "new" Avon gives me a website so you can order right from there, and my little business can be anywhere and everywhere, no stock to have to have on hand, no deliveries to make. I like that.
It is hard for me to get out and go shopping, so I appreciate the convenience of having quality, well priced items delivered to me.
OK, there's my pitch :-)
In other news, it is still winter here. Deep winter. And arse deep in snow. I look forward to Spring, and being sprung from here.
My MS is doing great, thanks to LDN. I have also recently started taking supplements to combat Candida. I had it, and beat it once. But apparently it is back, so I will fight it, and beat it, again.
Oh, and I'm a blonde now. REALLY blonde. And while I'm not having more fun, not yet anyway, I like it. Makes me think Spring is near...

V-Day

2009-02-14T11:27:00.001-05:00

Valentine's day. Bah, humbug. Maybe I'll rent a movie (not like I have plans or anything) What's on? lemmesee...ah, He's Just Not That Into You. Perfect.
*spits on ground*turns and walks away*

School

2009-02-10T13:52:00.002-05:00

At Last! It took longer then expected but Robbin started school today!
*doingnekkidmommyhappydance*
And on other news, I'm a blonde now. Very blonde.*giggle*I guess I've always wanted to know if it's true about blondes having more fun, 'cuz I sure as hell ain't having much now!
And on yet another note, it is 44* out today! And windy...that will help melt some of the snow out there, I can actually see water rippling in the parking lot (yes, dears, the lovely view out of my lovely window in my lovely apartment is of the lovely parking lot)(Such joy!) It is supposed to get cold again but at least *some* of the snow will have melted off...
CK sent me pics of my handsome boyo getting on his first school bus...he is so grown. I've had to miss SO many "firsts", it breaks my heart to miss them but I've had to. I'll be with him soon. And out of here. Now I just need to pray for the miracle of a home for us down there in the Interboro school district...Miracles DO happen. And I need a biggie!

Robbin's "Elvis" look, Black leather jacket and all!!

2009-01-23T15:52:00.001-05:00

Isn't he handsome?

2009-01-23T15:46:00.000-05:00

The Silver Lining

2009-01-23T03:03:00.004-05:00

The visit is over, and Robbin is back in Pa. And now this:
As I am sure you are aware, this whole situation with Robbin has been very difficult for me, on many levels. The reason I allowed him to go to school there was because I was convinced that the schools there were better equipped to deal with someone with Robbin's particular brand of brilliance. There were several private schools to choose from (the school district pays the tab) (in this case it exceeds 50k a year) but one shone more brilliantly then the others. That school is called Pathways. They keep their student body small, and are very selective as to who they accept. They get, on average, over 600 applications annually and accept only about 5%. Well, we got the call...Robbin is in!! They LOVED him, and even the teachers went to the meeting to plead his case (We want this child HERE! we WANT to work with him, he is a joy!) which is *very* usual...
So, he will start a week from Monday (takes that long to complete the rest of the paperwork, make his IEP, and get the bus scheduled for him) I am VERY impressed by the people, and will even be able to have phone/email contact with his teachers, so I will be able to follow his progress daily. And of course, as soon as I can move down there, and get a place within the school district, he will be living with me again! YAAY!!!
I am SO proud of my little man...he really impressed them, and made them fall instantly in love with him...this is the BEST school of it's type *in the country*! They get students from California, New York, even the Bahamas, because of their superior facilities and programs. Kind of like getting in Harvard...or a Montessori, but better and totally designed for HIM and HIS needs.
AH, finally some good news in this deep, dark winter...
And speaking of the winter, this one being especially harsh, even for here, I have to say something that will probably make you gasp...
I owe CK a huge debt of gratitude. Yes, I am saying this in public! Why? Because if she had not done what she did, when she did it, we would still be in the cabin. And while that is not necessarily a bad thing, this winter is very very cold and poor Rob would be working his arse off every day with the chopping wood/shoveling snow/trying to keep the pantry stocked bit...and it would be worse then last year by far, and the winter is far from over! The "january thaw" was today. Yes, ONE day, and the "thaw" brought us all the way up to the high 20's. Not exactly a "thaw" in MY book!!!!
And Robbin would not be going to the most excellent school he will be going to. So, CK, Thank you.
And as a FYI for y'all, she and I are getting along very very well, even Rob and I are talking and acting like adults...civilized, even! Robbin, of course, is delighted at all of the above...he is SO thrilled at the school he could burst...as could we all...This school treats not just the child, but all facets of the child...mental/physical/emotional, and even Spiritual! They have three "Zen" rooms the kids can chill out in if they need a little Q.T., which is awesome. I am SO looking forward to touring the school myself, meantime the website will have to do...
Oh Lordy! Is that my neighbor snoring? Or is there an angry bull outside? Geez! That is scary!!! Oh my......I thought I was bad.....
Well, it is time for bed. Nighty night.

sigh

2009-01-07T22:06:00.002-05:00

When I ended the past post, I was crying. Robbin came in (he had been in his bedroom) and asked why. I said "I'm ok hun, just thinking that the next couple of months will be a bit hard on me"As he went back into the bedroom I heard him very softly say "they'll be hard on me, too"
*crying hard now*

sigh

2009-01-07T21:14:00.002-05:00

I have heard Robbin say, many times, over the phone "I wish Mommy & Daddy were Mommy & Daddy again"
Now I have SEEN him say it, and when he said it, I saw the light in his eyes dim. I have never seen that before. It makes me SO sad to know that HE is so sad, and that *I* cannot do anything to remedy it.
*sob*

Update time

2009-01-07T15:20:00.002-05:00

Robbin is here, has been for almost 2 weeks *happydance* It has been pure bliss having him here. Rob and I finally have started mending fences. *she* and I have, as well. I only refer to her as *her* and *she* to protect her privacy, BTW. Though I might refer to her as CK (NOT her initials, BTW). We have been doing a LOT of talking. We have decided that what the court ordered was just plain unacceptable...what they wanted was, yes, for Robbin to have me 1 week, Rob the next...BUT, Robbin was supposed to travel back and forth from Florence to Philly EVERY WEEK, go to school here, AND there! So, ANY time off he had for weekend fun would ALL be spent traveling! Two sets of friends, 2 sets of teachers, of lessons, TWO homes..just NOT healthy in any way for my growing boy! Not to mention...sense of security? Not possible. And That is unacceptable. In every way. And let us not forget that the roads here are treacherous in Winter...SO, we have decided that Robbin will be going down to Rob's place and going to school there. The school there is way better equipped to handle Robbin, the one here would have to hire people especially FOR him, and since their resources are limited at best, Gawd knows who would end up teaching him? Whereas THERE, they have the resources, and the people already in place. So, it is best for Robbin to go there. Which means, after Sat I will only see him on teleconference, until Spring Break, when he comes to me (or I go down there and visit).
Another consideration, and a big one, is the weather. Here it is frigging COLD, the last few days if he were going to school here, he'd be waiting for the bus in -15* cold! Yes, that is MINUS 15*!!!! Dang! And today it is snowing..>ALL DAY...and do you think they called school off? nope.
Now, I am going to stay here, at least for now. We already have the divorce well under way, and by me staying here, we should be signing the final papers mid April. If I were to move there, we'd all have to start all over again, and divorce in Pa can take up to TWO years!! So I will stay here, and teleconference with Robbin there, and after the papers are signed and the ink dry I will move there. This gives us a few months to find a place for me there, and save for the move. At that time, Robbin will come live with me, with Rob having very liberal visitation...I need to find a place near them, so Robbin can easily go back and forth, and be in the same school district he is entering now. The aim is for Robbin to have BOTH parents nearby, and be able to establish a solid sense of security. So, yes, the next few months will be the longest, and darkest, and letting him go is the hardest thing I have ever done. But there *finally* is a light at the end of the tunnel. I have to do, as a parent, what is best for my son. And it is not right if I say that then do something that is not the best thing for him, and in his best interest. So that is what I am doing. Gods I start crying just thinking about it. I don't want him to go. But he will be happier there, and his growth will be better taken care of by the schools there. It hurts. It breaks my heart. But it is not about ME or my heart, but about HIM and his growth and his potential, which will be better nurtured by the schools there then they ever could here.
MS-wise I am surprisingly even. And I went to the Dr for a check-up, and am now off ALL meds! Only thing I still take is motrin as needed. I no longer need meds for diabetes, or BP, or anything! My blood came back perfect, and we did a pap, also perfect...so I am the healthiest crip on the block...

Ok, well...

2008-12-24T22:03:00.002-05:00

I took Rob to court, and we now have 50/50 custody, with a soon-to-be-appointed guardian ad litem. We have him week on/week off, with the "exchange" to be held here, at my apartment, every Sat at noon. They MUST have him here by Noon on Sat the 27th. And he *must* have contact with me tomorrow (Christmas day). Apparently they will open gifts then head out for here. I fear they are cutting it waaay too close, considering the weather. It has been snowing here for most of the last 2 days and there was a terrible accident (multi car) on one of the roads they must take to get here. I pray for their safety.
When Robbin called today he said Mom, I have been missing you for OVER TWO MONTHS (he almost shouted it). I have been crying almost all day, I just miss him SO much, this is the first Christmas in his whole life that he has not been with me. Tomorrow will probably also be hard. I thought I'd be able to get through it better, but I am an emotional mess. Just from missing my Robbin so much. Rob I don't miss. At all. She can have him, with my blessing. Just leave MY SON with ME and stop fritzing around with his life, his sense of security and his emotions! I'll be better when I can hug him again. I have some awesome things for him under the tree!!! He will be one happy camper! And so will I, because he will be HERE, where he belongs.
Merry Christmas, Blessed Yule, Happy Chanukah and Joyous Kwanzaa...whatever, whereever and however you celebrate the Holy-Days, be happy, and if you have your family around you, Know how Blessed you are. And Never, Ever, forget it.

ok

2008-11-26T08:54:00.005-05:00

I haven't been saying much because I really don't know what to say. Rob left me for someone else. That I don't care about. He has burned my bridge once too often and our union is no more. The unforgivable is that he took Robbin. I haven't seen my baby since Oct 7th. Which means I also missed his 11th Birthday. And Halloween. And tomorrow Thanksgiving. Because of Rob's acts, the lady we were buying the farm from considered our contract in default. So she sold it to someone else. Rob basically abandoned me in an unheated cabin in upper Wisconsin, with no wood and no mode of transportation. I am now living in an apartment in town. The last thing Rob said to me was a few weeks ago when he took the phone from Robbin (Robbin does call me) and screamed obscenities at me, culminating with "you can fucking ROT in Wisconsin!!!" and slammed the phone. I called right back and it took me several minutes to calm Robbin down. Not only was what Rob said nasty, the fact that he said it IN FRONT of Robbin makes it unforgivable.
And YES, I DID call the police as soon as I figured out what was happening. But here *I* was, the hysterical Mother, and here *he* was, the calm Father (of course he was calm, he knew all along what he was doing, I had just found out!) telling them it was just for a short visit, some father-son time. He good ol' boy'd them and they ate it up like candy, even escorted them off the property! With Robbin in *her* car and Rob taking our only vehicle. He lied. He told me, and them, that it would be for "2 weeks, MAX" That was SEVEN weeks ago, and he has made it clear through his actions that he has NO intention of bringing him back. He talks about his "rights" as a parent. WHAT ABOUT MY RIGHTS? What about Robbin's rights? He is being denied the ONLY constant he has had every day of his life. And another thing, Rob never ever even WANTED a child, when we first got together he said a zillion times "promise me you won't get pregnant" He also was responsible for several abortions when he was younger. And of the hundred or so trips he has taken during Robbin's life he never, ever, even ONCE asked about taking Robbin *with* him. Now all of a sudden he's Father of the Year? I don't think so.
The only reason Rob is getting away with this is we are still married. I intend to remedy that as soon as I can. Of course the Holidays slows everything down. Rob was angry at me for earlier postings that I have since removed, saying I "dissed" him "all over the internet" in my blog (gee, I didn't realize it was *that* popular), so I want to make it clear that I am not "dissing" anyone, merely stating the facts.
I am glad Rob is happy. I really am. I do not, I repeat, DO NOT, want him back. I will not be happy until my son is returned to me. Until Rob did this heinous act, Robbin had not been out of my sight for 24 hours in his entire life. I cry every day, several times. I never realized that heartbreak actually physically hurts. Well it does. Sometimes so much I think I am on the verge of a panic or anxiety attack. Sorry if I make typos, it is hard to see through the tears.
More than angry, I am hurt. I am hurt that he took my son, In smaller amounts I am sad that we lost the farm. In no manner am I sad about the end of our marriage. I had been very lonely and very unhappy in it. I always tried to put on a good face and accentuate the positive. For example, I told you about him building me a garden for Mother's day, and did not tell you he kicked a large hole in my bureau. When I asked him why he did that, he said "because I felt like it" Rob has intense anger issues, and even though I have done nothing to warrant it, that anger is being directed toward me. Possibly *because* I have done nothing to warrant it. Guilt is a powerful emotion, and Rob MUST know, on some level, that "he done me wrong" Big time.
I don't hate him. I pity him. Karma WILL catch up with them, and it won't be pretty.

Hootin' down the highway...

2008-09-13T01:24:00.002-05:00

Well, my ramp is finally built. Dang thing has nore wood then the house! It is over 32' long, gentle incline, and awesome! I'd post pics but alas, no camera. Today Rob encouraged me out, and I went on the grass for the first time (I had been down the ramp but not left it yet, not being sure how the chair would handle "terrain"). As a matter of fact, the first time I went out on it was the first time I had left the house since March! Well, Rob encouraged me to go on the grass and see the chicks and ducklings. He went inside and got a big bowl of feed for them, and I sat and fed them. Then he went and got a blue plastic thingy and filled it with water and made a mini-pool for them, which of course the ducklings immediately took advantage of, drinking their fill and having a bath, while I sat in the sun and watched. Then Rob got on his bike and Robbin on his, and we went down the driveway. When we got to the end he asked me which way I wanted to go. I've never been to the right, always the left toward town, so we went to the right. We went down the road, all three of us, Rob on his bike, Robbin on his 3-wheeler, and me on my chair. We went for over a mile! Then turned around and came home. There is a pretty fair hill on the way, and the chair went up it like it was flat. At the top I turned around and the guys were still at the bottom, struggling up...lol...then back down the driveway and home, by this time I had had enough sun, more then I had had all year cumulative! Came up the ramp, inside, and cracked a cold one!
Also...we *might* have a dog. A yellow lab, named Polly. She is at a rescue house, and they have been (please excuse the pun) Hounding me to take her. I guess her rescuer thinks (and quite rightly) that this would be the perfect home for her. To the point that they are even willing to bring her all the way here (from N. central Wi!) And to the point where they are not going to charge us anything...no fee, no re-homing, nuttin' Now, I like yellow labs, and she looks like a sweetie, and is still puppy enough to be able to learn the ropes here, so yeah, I think she's found her home and we've found our dog. BTW, My Maxx never came home. I miss his big, warm, wonderful self.
Anyway, that's the latest.

Life...and loss...on the farm.

2008-08-20T14:30:00.004-05:00

Good thing about the internet blog is, your tears don't stain the paper.
the day after I posted those pics of my beautiful Maxx, he went out for a walk and hasn't come back. It has been over a week, he is either stolen, starving or in Spirit. Granted, he was gone for 14 days last fall, but the longer he is gone, the more I fear that those pics are all I have left of him.
Second loss...our camera died today, so no more pics for awhile, until I can afford to replace it.
Now for the life part...we have decided that this farm needs a dog, so I am actively seeking one (using Craigslist and local e-groups) Got a few "bites" (maybe shouldn't use that term when talking about a dog) We need to find one that is poultry-friendly ("Fowl are Friends, not Food") since we don't want Fido chomping down on the ducks or chickens...Fido needs to defend them, not eat them. Maybe that will also help take my mind off Maxx (but that's not why we're doing it, that would be wrong) One email I got was about a nice, young (under a year) black lab mix, female, spayed, potty trained and they say an all around sweetie. They got her when wifey was preggers, so the pup and the kid could grow up together, of course now that boo-baby is here they're realizing how much work a baby is and poochy is being ignored, so they're looking for a good home for her. Don't know if that's "the one" yet, waiting for pics and to chat with her humans. One dog that was offered is a St. Bernard, "very sweet" but chomped on a stray cat (*not* a good sign) so she's out...the search continues...will let you know what and when (sorry, no pics).
Looks like Rob might be going East again, to do more work. This time...NO BUSES!!!
Please send prayers/vibes/light candles or whatever you do best for Maxx to come home.
Well, I think we're found out pup. She's a 4-year-old Rottie, cute as can be and perfect for our farm. I'm waiting for her mama to call or email, she did send some pics and it was love at first sight. 'Course we had a rottie/lab mix when I was preggers, called Mitzi. She could never "get it" that she shouldn't boss her way past me in doorways, especially the one that led to the (steep) stairs going into the garage. So we let Jimmy take her, it was supposed to be until the baby was born, but Jimmy, being Jimmy, let her run, knowing full well that the road he lived on was dangerous, and of course, she had an encounter with a Mac truck and lost. Broke my heart. Jimmy had lost several of his critters to the road (we found out alas too late). We still talk about her, even 10 years later. I have always had a soft spot for rotties and boxers. I hope we get her. I'll let you know. If it is to be, it will be.

The Big Guy

2008-08-10T14:34:00.001-05:00

Remember Maxxi-Moose, the stick-thin scraggly cat that showed up on our porch last fall? Well, he's not stick thin now! he's about 30# and a real lovvy. It took about a month of 2 cans a day to fill him out, now he eats only dry, with the occasional can as a treat. As you can see, he is quite healthy. In the next pics, you can see that one of his ears is a bit cauliflourey, we're not sure if this is from birth, the result of a fight or something someone did.
He sleeps, not only *with* me, but ON me. He stretches out from my collarbone to my hips and purrs me to sleep. Yes, he is the purrelizer. He's my sweetie, and I love him :-) He is one of the sweetest cats I've ever had, and they number in the 100's (Hey, I'm 54 and have had cats all my life, even bred them, so yes, there have been a LOT of cats in my life!).

Mr Maxxi-Moose

2008-08-10T14:24:00.000-05:00

Maxx, and those big green eyes

2008-08-10T14:23:00.000-05:00

the Brat Pack

2008-08-10T14:21:00.000-05:00

Goats.....and more goats....and more....

2008-08-04T14:31:00.005-05:00

We recently became "blessed" with 5 goats. All males. All "intact". All pygmy. While we are intending on sampling goat meat, we're not going to for a while. Meantime, they reside in an enclosed pasture. Well, it is our intention for them to reside there. They, however, have other ideas, especially since Michief is female. So, at least once a day there is a massive jail-break, followed by Mischief running all around the property with the horny pack (ok, so only three have horns) fast on her heels. Since she is bigger, older, and meaner, she usually keeps them running. When Rob goes out to put them back in their pasture, the process is easy. He puts his belt around Mischief's collar, a la' leash...and simply walks her to the pasture, with all 5 following docily behind. Into the pasture, close the gate, find and fix where the breakout point was, and voila', task complete. The funniest thing is watching him walking her, with the brat pack lined up behind. Oops...the brat pack (or as Rob calls them, the G-Force) are out...and Rob's not home...guess Mischief will get her exercise today...
Meanwhile, summer brings the inevitable farm nemesis, flies. Loads of them. I am constantly moving to remove them, like a horse shaking her skin. Legs move, arms move, hands swat. Constant. Sleep? nope, not with them landing on any and every available exposed inch. Not just once, over and over, like a Chinese torture. Sometimes I worry that Rob or Robbin will find me, head lolling, eyes unfocused....power chair going around and around in an aimless, endless circle...
The haircut. I got it cut the day before my birthday. While the cut, itself, is a good, well-done cut, all I can say is Thank God/dess it grows back. It's short! I told her, just the ends, leave it as long as possible. Somehow I seem to have mis-communicated. It's short. At least 6" shorter, and about as long as my index finger all around. And the color? Brown and silver. Lots of silver. Lots and lots of silver. Oh well, it'll grow back. As will Robs. He got one of those flies up his arse and went and had his all cut off!!! The *only* redeeming factor is he donated his thick, long, red braid to Locks of Love. So someone will end up with a magnificent wig! How many times have women stopped him and said "I want your hair!" Well, someone will be getting it. Actually, they'll have enough for 2 or 3. While I'm not so pleased at the cut (either of them), I am delighted beyond words at him donating it. Go Rob!

LOTRO

2008-08-01T15:21:00.002-05:00

LOTRO to answer the question posed, stands for Lord Of The Rings Online, an MMORPG, or Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. It is WoW (World of Warcraft) for adults. Not that it is adult themed, not at all, but the graphics are not cartoony and there is a storyline, unlike WoW. As a matter of fact, many, many of the people playing there came over from WoW. My character is a Huntress, named Shamana FairMaiden. She has recently been promoted to Leader of the Kinship. A kinship is a group that is like an extended family, they help each other with quests, and my Kinship is known for being helpful and Honorable. I play in the realm known as Gladden, there are about 8 realms to choose from. When you start play you customize and name your character. You can be a human, elf, dwarf or hobbit. Shamana is a female human. There are several types one can chose from, as in Hunter, Lore-Master (they have dominion ofer the animal kingdom), Capitan, Guardian, Champion, and Burgler. I've probably missed some. My characters are the Huntress and a Lore-Master. You can have as many as you want to play, since there are many realms and you can have 5 characters per. It gets even more involved, when you reach a certain level you can choose a profession, allowing you to train for skills, like cooking, farming, prospecting, jeweler, etc....these you can use to make $ and useable items. I found out about it from my PC guy, who sent me a link for a free 2 week pass (I can provide a similar link). It is endlessly amusing, there is real-time chat, lots of fun and challenging things to do and some really nice people to meet.
So there, that's what I do with a lot of my time :-)

Hair

2008-07-20T13:24:00.002-05:00

I guess the haircut thing is catching..Rob went to the store the other day, and while he was there he cut is hair! All of it! So he is now sporting "regular" hair, for the first time in years!! He did donate his braid to Locks of Love, bless his Heart! And now, on my last day to be 53 (my 54th birthday is tomorrow, the 21st) I am also having a hair trim. I'm not going to get it cut short, just the dead-ends cut and maybe have it layered.
I've been playing on *myspace* lately. And playing LOTRO.
I have a cage full of chicks on the porch. And 1 guinea keet. Wanting to get a turkey poult or two, and possibly some ducks.
Not much of a garden this year. too many other things took precedence and it never really got planted. I do have some squash and peas in, though.
Rob saw a cougar the other day, and a wolf.
So, you ask, what are we doing for my birthday? Not a darn thing.

The New Do

2008-07-10T18:45:00.000-05:00

the Hair

2008-07-09T18:22:00.000-05:00

Robbin has been growing his hair for about a year. Now all of a sudden he decides he wants it cut (possibly because I keep insisting he brush *and wash* it well) And while it breaks my heart to comply, I also realize that it will be much easier to care for (handsome lad, ain't he?) So tomorrow it will be done. He's going to a salon to get'er'done. I will post pictures of the new look.

2008-07-09T18:16:00.000-05:00

The ponytail

2008-07-06T19:58:00.000-05:00

the rabbit and another of her friends sunning themselves

little friend...

2008-07-06T19:56:00.000-05:00

This rabbit makes the strangest friends...and no, Pepe le Peu didn't spray...

The chair

2008-06-06T14:57:00.000-05:00

Yes, I am in it here...see next pic...

Me in the chair

2008-06-06T14:56:00.000-05:00

Don't ask mt why there is a Canadian flag...it's a long story. But there it is, moi and my ride...

Greyhound....

2008-06-05T23:34:00.003-05:00

UNFRIKKIN'BELIEVEABLE!!!
The saga of the ages...OK, so here's the deal. Rob is over on the East coast, dropping off Mike (aka Unkle Mikey) Some friends want him to swing by (swing by means go to Joisey for a day or two, to do readings and such). SO>>>>since our van is kinda on it's last, we decided Rob should go there by bus, then come home from there, also by bus (we have a friend who will buy the van, he is a crack mechanic *not that he does crack, he doesn't* and could fix anything) SO>>> I look up schedules on the net, and go to buy him a ticket from Hagerstown Md to Easton, Pa (closest stop to where our friends are). I input my numbers and get an error code. Oops. So I call the number it told me to call. They have NO record of the purchase, no confirmation number, nuttin', nada, niente. While I am listening to their extremely obnoxious elevator muzak, I check my bank account and find...they took the $!! So, I tell the lady, and she directs me to another phone #. So, I call it. To make a LOOOONG story short (don't worry, it gets better) I finally get a refund for my $. Oh, BTW, they has also charged me an additional $18 because *my* name was on the card, not Rob's.
SO>>>Rob shows up at the bus station this morning, he is #6 on the list, ohboyohboy. So of course, he gets bumped!!!!! Only one person got on the bus, and she had the #7! She just muscled her way onto the bus and left. Meanwhile, a near riot breaks out at the bus station, people screaming, fighting, yelling...but not getting anywhere! They tell Rob he can take the next bus, which leaves at noonish. So he does. Gets to Baltimore. There, they take his ticket, and put him on the bus...to Washington DC!!!They tell him that they had overbooked that bus as well (apparently that had overbooked ALL the buses!) and the only way he stands a chance of getting on to a bus to Philly (to connect with the bus to Easton) is to go to DC and take the bus back to Baltimore to get the connection. Problem is, they took his ticket! SO>>>when he gets to DC, they tell him his ticket is "broken" and he has to buy another ticket!!! By this time he has been on the road for 10 hours, and sez thehellwithit, I'll drive! They, of course, won't change the destination of his ticket, and he is forced to buy another ticket so he can get back to where he started!!! While in DC, someone got so irate, they set the place on fire, police called, everyone "questioned" and searched!!! When he gets back to Baltimore, there apparently has been someone on one of the buses that was very ill (like TB kinda ill) the place is cordoned off, swat team, hazmat team...looks like a scene out of the Blues Brothers!!!
SO>>>he *finally gets back to Hagerstown, tired, hot, hungry...he'll take the van up tomorrow then head home, I guess we'll trade the van in when he gets here...he said he will NEVER get on another greyhound bus, he'd rather walk!!!
What I don't understand is...HOWTHEHELL are they still in business??????
And that, believe it or not, is the nutshell!!! There were a LOT of nuts inside!
Oh, and here's another nut for the shell...a cashew (guzhundheit)..his ticket was refundable, and when he asked about that, they told him that they were a franchise and didn't have to do a darn thing greyhound told them to do and they weren't going to give them anything, other then sell him another ticket! When he gets back and I have ticket numbers, I am going to make sure my voice is heard!!! This is an outrage, a total disgrace, they have NO RIGHT to treat people like that!

Well well well...

2008-06-05T00:00:00.003-05:00

Life, as we know it, can resume, at least to some degree. I got my power chair today!!!WOOT It is big, and blue, and very, very quiet. I am getting slowly used to the tilt of the back (or non-tilt as it were). It has that new power chair smell. Rob is out of town (what?!? Again?!?) well, yes, again, Mike had to go home sometime. Now, the front porch is enclosed, with BIG windows, the kitchen is remodeled, and our lives will finally get back on track, both financially and just plain in general. He will stop up in Joisey tomorrow, then back down to Md. There he will sell the van and get a bus ticket home. Why? Well, what it would cost to keep the van would not be cost effective (it needs major work, tires, brakes, etc...) and seeing the cost of gas, cheaper to take the bus. And we still have the ford he can get back on the road when he gets back. I have some chicks (15 buff orphingtons and 15 guinea keets) coming on the 11th, need to get the farm going, crops planted, fields tilled, remodeling finished (almost there, finishing touches need to be applied). WOOHOO!! The social worker called today, they're going to build my ramp and do some work in the bathroom to make showering easier for me, and set up a plan where someone comes and takes me shopping from time to time. The van was hard enough for me to get into, the truck is neigh impossible, so someone with a car will help enormously!!! So life will improve vastly for me, I will be able to get out of the house more then 2-3x a year lol...So thereya go, all the news that's fit to print...Oh, and you can find me on myspace now. I didn't realize how many of my friends have pages there!
And what do y'all think of Barak? I think he would do well to run with Hillary as VP, but I doubt he will, banking on the same factors that were not progressive enough to have a female pres also not accepting a female VP...but that's just my opinion...he could do worse...

Finally!!

2008-05-12T14:21:00.002-05:00

Well well well, it seems Spring did remember us after all! Rob was gone for a week, and the day he left, we had a blizzard! Bur =t seems that was the "last blast" because it cleared up and got nice out, even have windows open! He went to Ct. to do some Reiki-type sessions, then down to NJ for some more, then a literally flying rush through Md to get Unkle Mikey, who is now here and remodeling my kitchen, so far they've made it from a pass-though to an island kitchen! I will post pics when it is done, for now it is still under construction but it is looking awesome, they've followed the general 'theme' of the house and made it from rough-cut wood. Mike is planning on wood-burning the cabinet doors, can't wait to see what he does there!
Yesterday was Mother's day, and we've started brewing our own beer, so yesterday we bottled two batches, one a nut-brown, and one an Irish porter. Now to wait till they finish....at least a week...Mother's day also brought me a new Microwave (ours had blown a few months ago, and I have really missed it) and a flat-screen TV for the bedroom! WooHoo!! We used to have a regular big TV in there but it fell and busted (long story) and we've been without since, so Rob rectified that, got a really nice one with DVD and everything! So now when we get our Netflix movies, I can watch them in comfort, instead of on the PC, like we have been. I just sent back Transformers and Shrek3 (dang!)
My power chair is still not here, walking gets more painful on almost a daily basis. I have been on LDN for over a year now, it does help, I still get some sporadic numbness (mostly my hands) but all-in-all it has improved my MS, so I don't regret it. Since I can't take the "normal" MS meds at least I have something I *can* take, and something that helps.
Oh, and I saw two sandhill cranes the other day! Boy are they huge!

Now, I ask you...

2008-04-09T11:37:00.001-05:00

is THIS what one expects to see out their window the morning of APRIL 9th?!?!?!?!?
Yes, we got more snow last night, to the tune of about 5-6"! Our truck became a farm truck yesterday, then it excreted upon the place of repose (i.e. shit the bed) Of late: the spring sprang, the power steering pump stumped, and now the whole exhaust system is in the driveway! Not worth it to fix, so we've put the van back on the road and the truck will be used for farm work only. Oh, and awesome news, Unkle Mikey has agreed to come up and help with the construction of the great room! We get at least 6 weeks of our dearest and oldest friend! Not to mention Robbin's Godfather! Now we have to hope all this snow melts so they can pour the cement base...even the locals are grumbling and bitching about it lol...Louie was saying "snow! What good is it? Just melts and makes mud! Snow! bah!" One of the good things about small towns is the neighbors are awesome...Louie plows us out, and when the UPS driver called because he had a delivery that was fairly heavy and he didn't want to walk it all the way down the driveway (1/4 mile of mud, he was afraid his truck would get stuck) I told him Rob was in town, in his office across from Kellys..he said "Oh, the liquor store? I can leave it there..." and he did. So now everyone in Florence knows we got a new gas space heater...seems drinking and hunting are the main pastimes 'round cheer...so everyone passes through the liquor store...Another small town store, also involving the liquor store...I got some vitamins in the mail. Rob accidentally dropped the package while in town. He remembered it, and was going back on his bike (this was in summer) for it. Meantime, someone found them and took them into Kellys. The gal who works there, well, her brother is the local gendarmerie'...Rob, on the way to town, wizzed past the local law (the brother of the gal that works at the liquor store)...Here I am in the home, and a few minutes after Rob left, the police pull in...I think OMG, what happened? Was there an accident? No, the local law was delivering my package! Even though it only had a p.o. box address, they knew who it was for! He said he saw Rob on the way and would have stopped and given it to him but he was going too fast so he brought it here...now, could THAT happen in a city? Any city? Nope...another reason to love it here! Yes, the winters are brutal, they tell me this is not the norm, that by now the farmers usually are planting...but aside from the winter, the perks that come from country living are priceless!

March

2008-03-31T20:27:00.002-05:00

Is it March that comes in like a Lion and goes out like a Lamb? Well, nobody bothered to mention it to the local weather system....it *was* getting warmer and some of the snow was melting off...today it is in full blizzard mode, white-out, snow...lots of snow...Rob went to town and barely made it back, and the hard part was our driveway...snow on top of mud. Guess we're getting our April Fool's weather a day early!
I still haven't heard back about either the Jazzy or the social worker. We are planning to add to the house, build another big room just like this one (Cordwood), and we're hoping to import Unkle Mikey to do the woodwork. He is a master at wood, nobody better.
We're going to make it power-chair friendly. This house is, and we'll put a ramp from one level to another. I Love multi-level places. We have big plans for this place, we just Love it, love it here, even though the winters are a big harsher then we expected...but then again I have heard from several sources that this winter has not been typical.
I put in our chick order today, getting 25 Light Brahmans, but they won't be here till mid-May. I was going to order Guineas, but they're $4.50 each, minimum order 30! No can afford! So, there are neighbors that have guinea fowl, we might see if they have any for sale, or maybe our friend L. can find some, she goes to all of the local swaps. We need to get more rabbits, too...and maybe more ducks. Might, just maybe, there is a teensy possibility, might get a dog. Or not. Dogs are great, they have many benefits, but some drawbacks...like, they'd eat the livestock (the chicks, ducks, rabbits...I think the goat is safe, from the dog at least) and that would tick me off bigtime!

Spring?

2008-03-17T12:24:00.002-05:00

Well, they TELL me Spring is coming. I try to believe it...the days Are getting warmer, now they're just warm enough to melt some of the snow by day...enough that when it freezes again at night our driveway becomes a 1/4 mile long skating rink! Rob often has to park out on the road and walk home with the mail or groceries! But the chickens are starting to lay a few eggs (we've gotten 5 nice brown ones so far), and my seed order came from Fedco, so it Must be on it's way!
I am still trying to get that Jazzy power chair, haven't heard back but it's still early in the process. I had to go see the Dr again to do more paperwork for it. While I was there they took blood (all my levels are good, at least inside I am healthy as a horse!) and they took X-rays of my ankle, hence the handy-dandy air splinter. What I haven't figured out is, How can they tell from an X-ray that my ankle tendons are weak? How does an X-ray depict strength?
Rob's "career" with ASKNOW is taking off, so he is getting an office in town so he can do more readings and have some quiet for them. This house is awesome, but the acoustics are also awesome, so when he tried to do them upstairs, he hears everything going on down here, and when he tries in the basement, he hears Robbin and I walking, and when I am using the walker it is "thump thump thump...." so for $300 a month he is getting a nice, semi-furnished 2 br apartment right in town. It is upstairs, and very quiet. It is also our backup home, so when we decide to so any remodeling here, we can go stay there. There is some plumbing that needs to be fixed and Rob wants to remodel the kitchen so that there is an island in it, that will make it more functional for me when I get the Jazzy...so now he can do those projects and not have to worry about not having water or being able to cook while he is doing them. Although it IS upstairs, he said that with the splint and his help there should be no problem getting me up there.
I am also going online there, our hope is that we get completely financially able to go off "the dole" (my SSI, which will go down the more $ we make)

yodamammas ms&more

2008-03-13T00:02:00.001-05:00

What Kind of Empath Are You?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Universal

You are a Universal Empath, you possess all the qualities of the other seven empath groups. You are what is known as an "Implicate" or Imp, a product of evolutionary design and genetic mutation. You are a psychic hybrid. (from "The Book of Storms" by Jad Alexander at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Empaths/)

Universal

95%

Healer

85%

Judge

80%

Shaman

80%

Traveler

75%

Artist

70%

Fallen Angel

70%

Precog

65%

Of late...

2008-03-11T12:42:00.002-05:00

Well, we managed to drag my carcass over the ice and went to the Dr. Result? I now have a handy-dandy torture device (read-air splint) attached to my right ankle. I have "weak ligaments" No duh. I am also looking toward finally getting the *T*'s crossed and the *I*'s dotted to get a jazzy (power chair) The Dr. filled out all the necessary paperwork while I was there, so I KNOW it got done (just hope it also got mailed) Not that I really have anywhere to *go* in it, but it will make getting around the house easier, and even getting out and just toodling down the road, a little quiet time, reconnecting with Nature...and maybe visiting a friend who actually lives within range :-)
Wisconsin winters are endless. Might as well have moved to Alaska. But! There's hope! It is 36* and sunny, some of that snow HAS to be melting off! I know Spring *must* be on it's way! the chickens are even starting to lay again, got 2 nice brown eggs so far~~~I really DO love it here, though, love this house, and the quiet! and the stars! I really wish I had a way to photograph them for you. Most places, the light pollution blots them out, here, they go all the way to the ground!
We have gotten in some lovely, very very powerful Tibetan quartz crystals. Rob has been making some awesome pendants with them, we have some posted on eBay
He has set them in copper, hand drawn to a thick wire. The metal really "works" with the energies of the stone. I am wearing one, and so is he. Of course, they're not in the auctions (there are 5) You can also see them on our site
We also had a social worker come out, to see what programs I might qualify for. Haven't heard back. I am hoping I will at least qualify for the handicap ramp. I know Rob can build one, but I'd rather they did, save him the trouble, he has SO many other things *on his plate*. Hopefully with the Jazzy I will be able to pull my weight a bit more around the house, and with Spring coming, there's the gardens to put in and all that...I got a bunch of seeds coming from Fedco, they seem to specialize in cold weather seeds.
Well, that's all the news that's fit to print...

AWESOME sunrise pic taken by Rob

2008-02-27T11:54:00.000-05:00

Isn't it beautiful! He said the streak went even higher but the camera couldn't capture it all

It's Winter

2008-02-22T13:32:00.000-05:00

And we're all going nuts! And feelin' a mite squirrely...

A Wisconsin Poem

2008-02-13T14:45:00.001-05:00

It's winter in Wisconsin
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At twenty-five below.

Oh, how I love Wisconsin
when the snow's up to your butt
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut.

Yes, the weather here is wonderful
So I guess I'll hang around
I could never leave Wisconsin

'Cause I'm frozen to the ground!!

Author unknown, I wish I did know who wrote it, so I could give 'em a hug and a chug (of hot cocoa)

Snow

2008-02-12T14:55:00.000-05:00

Ok, this is what it looks like outside. From Dec. until March. BBrrrr.

Frikkin' BRRRRR!!!!

2008-01-30T13:12:00.000-05:00

Well, it IS Wisconsin in the winter...what did I expect?...it is a balmy -8 out with a windchill of -38 Snowed like crazy yesterday, today is clear and sunny and blindingly white Very windy, I am watching it snow sideways (wind whipping the snow across the fields) We got about 1/2' of snow, clean and sparkling white, like a million zillion diamonds...really beautiful, IF you can sit inside and watch...if you have to go outside, well...all I can say is, I'm so sorry!
MS wise...I still don't have a scooter, and now everytime I step with my right foot the ankle pops over, so Rob got me a walker. I hatehatehate that I need it but I d have to admit it helps (bleah) I have had to remove myself fro kitchen duties, and let Rob do the cooking. Which, as it turns out, is a good thing...my hubby is a culinary genius, who knew? I *like* to think all these years of eating my chow have rubbed off on him...
We've found homes for ALL the kittens, down to three cats...Razzie, L'ilBit and of course the lovable Maxxi-Moose. Maxx sleeps on the bed with me, and sometimes will come up and stretch himself out along my torso to be scritched and rubbed...he is SO heavy! Now that we're kittenless, Razzie and L'ilBit have become very, well...present, demanding affection, where before they had faded into the background..
For some reason lately I have been drawn to St. Bridget. Wazzup wit' dat?

Happy New Year

2007-12-31T13:33:00.000-05:00

Well, 2007 sure has been roller-coaster of a year! We've moved, bought a home (NEVER expected THAT lol) (Actually, I DID, I did a New Year's reading last year and in it I asked if we would buy a home during the year. Got a YES. Asked if it was within the first 6 months. Got a YES. We moved here in April)(But since when am I right???) My foot has gotten way worse, Winter here sees me home-bound, since my footing is not secure enough for walking on snow and/or ice. Rob is even talking about becoming "snowbirds" in Winter, Not because we can't handle the winter, but so *I* can actually have a life for more then 6 months a year. Even if or when I get a scooter I'd still not be able to use it in the snow, whereas down in Fla (he has family there) I would be able to get out and *do* stuff. I *can* still drive, getting IN the van is hard but once I'm in, I'm golden! Still, this is MY HOME, and I'd rather tough it out here...who wants to live with another Alpha female for 6 months a year? Not me! *shudder*
The last 2 months have been abysmal when it comes to finances! Last month we had to pop $250 for wood, so the rest of the month was very "slim", This month? Well, so far the chainsaw has busted, will cost almost as much to replace it as to fix it(about $400), the cooking gas tank *just* ran out (another $250 to fill it) Just got the tax bill ($800) and I am *still* trying to catch up with the bills that lapsed last month! So now we have all that wood and can't cut it up! Silver lining is, the hot water heater is electric (if it were gas we'd be taking cold showers), and Rob had cut up several day's worth of wood before the saw pooped. And the guy that fixes them, is also becoming a dealer. We'll be his first customers, and he has a saw he will loan Rob if he needs it until such a time as we can buy the new one. Also, the tax people...the lady in the tax office happens to be the WIFE of the guy with the saws! She said that just send in what we can when we can till it is all paid, as long as it is within the year. We Can cook, have a camp stove and a crock-pot. So, even though financially things are dire, life goes on. Hopefully 2008 improves things. I have hope, and as long as there is Hope and Humor...and Love, gotta have that!
I went off Cymbalta, and back on Sam-E. Yes, I have to pay for it, insurance doesn't cover it, but I found a good source for it. There were a few very black days during the transition. And of course ALL the financial stuff hit during those days, all at once! dang! Makes me glad we're on to a New year, new chapter in the book of Life. So Happy New Year, all y'all!

Beaches

2007-12-28T14:12:00.000-05:00

When I look back at all the things I used to be able to do, that now I can no longer do, I feel a bit like a beach. A nice, clean, sandy beach somewhere tropical, with blue skies and coconuts. And there's the Sea. That's the MS. Every clear, sparkling wave takes a few of my grains, erodes me, little by little, grain by grain. People don't SEE the MS, they just see pretty waves, frolic in them, not realizing I am being taken, bit by bit, fragment by fragment, grain by grain. Some days are stormy. Those days the beach is empty and I am alone. There might be a few storm watchers (family, friends), but I still feel alone and empty those days. Those days also are the ones that erode me the fastest. Then there are the MS exacerbations...Tropical Storms that erode me even faster. Stress can be a Tsunami to my beach. I feel helpless against the onslaught of those waves, all I can do is watch myself being taken, feel myself being lessened, look back at the richness my life used to be. I used to dance on those waves, now sometimes I hate them, hate what they're doing to me. I mourn myself, miss myself, and desperately want myself back. But I know it is not to be, I will never dance again.

Isn't he georgous!

2007-11-20T14:21:00.000-05:00

Wait till he's all filled out again!

MaxxiMoose looking languid

2007-11-20T14:19:00.000-05:00

You can almost see how green his eyes are here

MaxxiMoose

2007-11-05T16:00:00.000-05:00

Believe it or not someone dropped off this glorious Maine Coon cat! He has been on his own for some time by the way I can still count his ribs...he is spayed and declawed. why would someone abandon a helpless cat? Once they have no claws, they have NO defense, can't even climb a tree to escape danger. I saw him out on the porch one night, late. Wasn't sure what I had seen, so large and dark, so I went out and called, heard a meow that was unfamiliar, and HE came around the corner. He was literally starving, I put out some food and I swear I have never seen a cat eat so frantically. I put out my hand and he rubbed, raised up to it, and I was lost. I called Rob, took him about 1/2 second to declare him ours. He went in and brought out a chicken leg, also devoured...it took a few days to entice him in, but as you can see that was successful :-) Rob named him Maxx (as in Maximus Kitty) I named him Moose, so he is MaxiMoose, or Big Guy. He has GREEN eyes, so green! He is a brown mackeral tabby. I finally got all the burrs out of his tail. He is eating 1 to 2 cans a day, plus dry, and finally starting to fill back out. We estimate he lost about 1/2 of his body weight, from where he should be.
In other news:
Rob is currently in Fla. His Father passed. Rob has been gone a week, as of today. He left the night of Robbin's 10th Birthday. He will probably still be gone for about a week. I am doing Ok, got food and sundries to last, and can drive as far as to go into the nearby town if I have to. I miss him SO bad!
As you can see, I got my camera replaced, so I will be posting pics again YAAY

Heat

2007-10-08T13:29:00.000-05:00

Yesterday it was 85* here, and the sun was beating in the window right on to me. Kicked my booty! I barely remember getting dinner in the oven, Rob took me to bed where I promptly passed out. Completely! Rob was left to finish and serve dinner. Later, when I came to, he also made me some dinner (poached egg on wild rice) (they have wild rice locally, I often have some already prepared in the fridge). I ate, watched Desperate Housewives and Brothers & Sisters, vaguely remember what happened on them, and slept till noon. I still fee like I have cotton in my head. Today is cooler, not much temperature-wise (81*) but it is overcast and the wind is cool, also Rob lowered the blind in that window so even if the sun does come out I am protected. I haven't had an exascerbation (I call them exasperations) in a long time!! I hope I don't have another one for awhile...the LDN helps! I have also recently started taking a Homeopathic called Bioplasma, it contains all 12 cell salts. Hopefully it will also help.

I'm back

2007-10-05T14:48:00.000-05:00

Not that I've been anywhere. Life has been quiet. My camera is kaput, getting a replacement. And I've missed being able to show y'all all the glorious fall colors. Absolutely awesome, puts the N.E. to shame. The weather has been splendid, although it is Fall, it is still very comfortable out. The bad news is our friends are moving away, makes me sad. On the 11th I will have y P.T. eval for the scooter. So I might be "mobile" again soon. we still have a ton of flies, but it's better. The cows still roam the garden but we are actively discouraging them. The other day there were three eating apples under the tree in the backyard, Rob "actively discouraged" them by lobbing apples at them. One of them, Rob got it midside with an apple. The cow stopped, turned around, ate the apple and sauntered away...I laughed hard on that one...there are a ton of deer in t he fields, we see them daily, and turkey as well. Lots of them! The chicks are growing and thriving. Those turkens are UGLY, but I love 'em. They are SO Dr' Seussian...
It is rainy today, but it is a warm rain. It is in the 70's, perfect for me, am comfy in some light sweats and a t-shirt.
I have been playing the SIMS alot of late, the online as well as offline. I like the online since I can interact with real people. They're changing the game though, merging all cities, it will be a different game, but who knows? might be even better.

One of the black Turkens

2007-09-04T13:38:00.000-05:00

Robbin on his new bike

2007-08-31T16:23:00.000-05:00

And Yes, Momma's going to use it as well :-)

One of the Turken chickes

2007-08-31T16:17:00.000-05:00

OMG!!!! (Oh My Gourd)

2007-08-29T19:39:00.000-05:00

What the heck do I do with THIS?!?!?!? Gourdzilla?!?!?

Dang Thing Is Finally Catching Up With Me

2007-08-25T20:01:00.000-05:00

Aside from MS, I also have severe scoliosis and arthritis. Pretty bad arthritis, too, they have stated it as "riddled with". Yeehaw. At the tender age of 13 I was told that by 30 (I am 53) I would be permanently in a wheelchair, and would be about 4'6" (I am 5'). I have been running from that damn chair ever since. At the time, I went home and for the next year, walked with a book on my head, to straighten my posture. That year bought me 33. But now, it is finally at the door, beckoning me to sit and finally be comfortable. I HATE that I am finally going to call the Dr and ask for one. I HATE that it is catching up with me. Rob says, it is not, repeat NOT, giving up my freedom, but claiming it. I don't agree. But today, we went to the County Fair and I walked. And walked. And walked. And when I finally sat down, in pain and with very little relief in sight, listening to the slightly cheezy band (this IS Wisconsin, after all), and starting in on a pity party because I realized I could have been comfortable and not in pain ~ but that I am, and have been, too damn stubborn (Rob says I am not stubborn, I am tenacious), I looked around and say a little boy, maybe 6? in a chair. God slapped me in that moment. HE said, you are 53, you have walked, run, and danced your way around much of this world. That little boy will never walk, run, or dance. I am humbled. He had a twin brother. The twin had developmental difficulties, both boys had hearing aids and glasses. (sorry if I typo, I will try to correct them all, hard to see, I am crying) I remembered those same Dr's that condemned me at 13, also told me I would NEVER have children, don't even try, I'd end up either dead or in a wheelchair. I had Robbin at 43, I have beat the odds, in every way, and for more years than I have any right to. Robbin chose that moment (chose?) to run up to me and hug me. I will call The Dr. I will get a chair/Jazzy/whatever. I will listen.
And I just want to clarify that to mu knowledge it is *not* the MS or the scoliosis that is bringing me to this, it is the arthritis. There might be *some* influence from the MS and the scoliosis, but it is mainly o' Arthur that brings the pain, the inability to freely stride, and the pain. I an in constant, chronic pain. Nothing helps aside from a fairly constant infusion of Motrin. I get 100 Motrin 800's a month, and so through quite a few of them. Some days I am able to go without, some days I take 3. Today I have already taken 2, and will take another before bed, but then again I overdid, so that is to be expected. My right knee needs a TKR, which I am also resisting and will continue to resist, my left knee is not far behind. One step at a time (no pun intended). But yes, it is Jazzy time.

Turkens

2007-08-23T12:01:00.000-05:00

No, they don't ever grow feathers on their necks, and furthermore, if exposed to the sun their necks turn red, making them look a bit vulture-like. Google them, there are pics of adult Turkens out there....very strange critters...

Turkeys

2007-08-22T12:31:00.000-05:00

This is a flock of wild turkeys we saw one morning out in the field. there are 3 adults and about 11 to 13 juveniles. Yum.

And Turkens

2007-08-22T12:29:00.000-05:00

These very strange looking chicks are turkens. I ordered chicks (I believe I already blogged about that) and in the shipment were 5 of these really, REALLY strange looking nakked-neck chicks, 1 blonde, 1 reddish, and 3 black. In this pic you can see two of the blacks and the blonde one. Look closely, you can see they have no feathers from 1/2 way down their heads, leaving a topknot, to their shoulders. They look like something created bt Dr Seuss...on acid. However, apparently they ARE a heavy breed, good layers of large brown eggs and make a fine, big roaster, growing to an average of 6 lbs! Their feathering derives from a recessive gene, their name from the fact that at first people thought they were a crossbreed between chickens and turkeys, from the nekkid neck and the large size. Not so, they are all chicken.

Netting part 2

2007-08-13T14:18:00.000-05:00

The pics I refer to in the previous post are the pics I ordered the nets from, on eBay, not pics that *I* posted.
I've ordered more chicks, 25 straight run heavies (translation...25 heavy breed chicks that have not been "sexed", so there will be roos' and hens, the roos will end up as dinner, the hens will live ling, egg laying lives. Unless a roo really stands out, in which case he will probably live).
KaliKa had her litter a few weeks ago, right after my birthday. We know where they are. rob just brought one in, and now we also know who *got* her..there have been sightings of a black and white cat, until now I did not kow it's gender...I guess it's a boy, since the kitten Rob just brought is is.....black and white! And he just brought in one that is black and white AND calico! The other two are orange and white tabbies. There are FOUR of them! Pics to come...(Good Job KaliKa!! Way to go girl!!!)

Netting

2007-08-07T15:05:00.000-05:00

We got the mosquito netting YAAY!! Robbin's was supposed to be blue, but is a very lovely aqua color, Rob's and mine is lavender/lilac. I got a spare so Rob can put it out on the upstairs porch and do his readings out there, no bugs to distract him. Very very nice nets, way prettier then the pics showed! I am VERY happy, I hated seeing Robbin's little body with those nasty mosquito bites...even one is one too many, he's my baby! Now we'll ALL be able to rest peacefully...that will help SO much, as you might know one of the symptoms of MS is crushing fatigue, and not being able to get a full night's rest has been taxing. Now the flies won't wake me and I'll be able to sleep.
BTW I have been on LDN for over a year now and still going strong!!

2007-08-06T22:26:00.001-05:00

http://www.picture.com/voteforme/photovote1.asp?PID=21668
Vote for Rob's pic!

Lord of the Flies

2007-08-06T19:00:00.000-05:00

One of the fun things if having a cow pasture right next door. We have more flies buzzing around then I can tell you! We've used fly strips, and finally resorted to chemical warfare...all to no avail. Every morning when I am trying to sleep they buzz and buzz...they have the uncanny knack of landing on any speck of exposed flesh...again and again....I HATE sleeping with the covers over my head but there is no choice...if even as much as the tip of my nose is exposed they find it. SO, I have something coming that should thwart their efforts...Mosquito netting! I got one for our bed, one for Robbin's bed, and a spare for just-in-case's. the ducks are growing and they do all they can to eat as many flies and other assorted bugs as they can, but it is a daunting task even for the most experienced duck.
Now, for some good news...Our website is back up!!! New website name is HealingRob
My email is akiba@healingrob.com, Rob's is rob@healingrob.com. I also still have the gmail address and the aol address of course, but this will be, finally, a renewal of our ability to do readings and healings through our site. Rob and I are both now Reiki Masters as well, aside from our own "brand" of Healing. Rob has been reading for asknow.com (I believe I included a link to it in a previous post) and getting totally rave reviews and fabulous feedback.
Dinner tonight: mixed beans (black beans and black-eyed peas) with zesty tomatoes and cheese smoked sausage...baked as a casserole, served over rice. It's one of our new favorite meals...I use different beans or different sausages (sometimes brats). Very easy, very yummy, very nutritious. The zesty tomatoes are chopped canned 'maters with jalapeno, I find them in the canned 'mater section, Always have several cans on hand it is Such a versatile ingredient! Sometimes I do it in the crockpot, sometimes just in a casserole dish...always very good!
When Rob and Robbin were going to the store today they saw a black bear with cub!! At the end of our road, where it meets with the main road, about 1 1/2 miles away!! WOW!
Well off to make that rice...

Heating

2007-07-24T10:36:00.000-05:00

I have been asked if this place is hard to heat..well, with 16" walls and triple insulated windows, no, we could heat it with a candle! Rob installed a woodstove and even on a cold day we can get it so warm my coconut oil melts...all the way across the room! So heating really is not a problem :-)
This past weekend was my birthday. It was Saturday, but we had the party on Sunday. It was a lovely time, BBQ'd burgers and chicken, kids had a good time playing. Everyone loved Mischief (the goat). I got some lovely goodies :-) even the chickens put in an appearance.

2007-07-20T11:22:00.000-05:00

I've been reminded that I have yet to post a picture of the outside of the house...well, here it is! It's bigger then it looks. You can see that there are two large covered porches, the bottom one wraps around the far side of the house as well.

2007-07-19T12:00:00.000-05:00

Another pic of Mischief

Mischief and more

2007-07-19T11:56:00.000-05:00

Meet Mischief the goat. She is a 2 year old Oberhasli. She follows us around like a dog and is very very sweet, but she DOES live up to her name! I've never had a goat before, but I must admit I'm totally hooked! we got her through a freecycle type of ad, she was bound for the butcher if someone didn't step up for her, and of course we did, and couldn't be happier! And there was an extra bonus...we've become friends with the lady who placed the ad. By way of clarification, it was not her goat, she is the herdsman (herdsmistress?) and when the ranch owner decided to cut Mischief from the herd she placed a desperate plea, and it was that call that I answered. She makes awesome soaps from the goat's milk, and other goodies...I have connected her with another friend who runs a spa from her home, to sell her goodies there, talk about a perfect connection! And Rob is going to be doing healings there as well...AND we've got a salt lamp in there, and she might be using some of the Solay products in her work. PLUS, I've been making an arnica salve that I've been using for almost a year, so many people have told me I should package and sell it, that I went and ordered some jars and am going to put it out for sale in her spa as well...and I'm going to send it to some MS'rs, since I feel they could benefit from it (as I have).
Saturday is my 53rd birthday. we're having a party on Sunday, and everyone mentioned above is coming, so they'll all meet. I have the feeling they will also be instant friends...

Life and Death on the farm

2007-07-04T14:37:00.000-05:00

It has taken me a few days to be able to really write about this. The raccoon Rob shot? Well his big brother came the next night and killed every last chick. Karma? Maybe. More like the nature of things. That does not make it easier. All my beautiful girls, dead. If it was Karma, it was on overdrive...or on this case, overkill. But you know, the world continues to turn, the sun to rise, the rain to fall. Friends, some whom I don't even know, are filling the hold. A Neighbor is giving me a pair of Banties, Ok, so Banty eggs are not my big brown lovelies, but an egg is an egg. And she is bringing us some ducks, Moscovies, the scourge of Florida, but apparently much desired in other parts of the country, like here. And a friend of hers has a hen gone broody, and will give us the chicks when they hatch. But I still mourn, and will mourn, my sweet girls.
We are also seeking Guineas...there are ticks and bugs and all sort of delicacies here for them. Rob is going to build a new coop, right off the back, going out from the door that leads to nowhere, and making it lead to somewhere, and this way *I* will be able to care for them and keep them safe. I DO feel guilty, I kept getting the urge to open the bedroom windows that night but it was cold so I didn't. If I HAD, we would have heard the ruckus and might have been able to save at least some of them. The raccoon pawprint Rob found was 2" wide and 3" long...had to be at least a 50# critter. It even tipped over the big rabbit hutch. The rabbits survived but all escaped, so we have free-range rabbits now. I REALLY need to learn to listen to my voices.
Mercury is Retrograde, cantcha tell?
And there is even more life growing...KaliKa is pregnant. the kittens Phoenix had are now almost 8 weeks and Chizzle will go to his new home on Friday. Misty purred for me this morning, and the other one, Freya, we've had to rename Loki, since She is a He.
Happy Forth of July, everyone.

We've already stared the fireworks...

2007-06-30T11:10:00.000-05:00

4:15 this morning I hear a sound. So I sit up and look out, it is already light out. I wait. Finally I see the raccoon, the big one that has eluded Rob for three shots so far. He is (as you can see....HUGE) I know I can take out the window screen and wait, and I'll stand a good chance of getting a clear shot. Nice way to wake everyone up :-) So I wait, and watch, as Rocky comes dangerously close to getting into the chicken coop (never would have made it, I may be old and slow but my bullets aren't). Then Rocky goes across the grass toward the house. Out of my line of vision. So I come to the front of the house, near the garden.
The other day I had some old grapes in the fridge. I tossed them out to compost in the garden. Rob said "you should put them in the compost bucket, the way they are they might attract raccoons"
Yeah, so guess where ol' Rocly was? Just a-chompin' on those grapes. About 6 feet away from me, and looking me right in the eye. So I guess I "baited" him...I know I can't open the window without spooking him...
So I go and get Rob, tell him if he goes upstairs he'll have a clear shot...I figure after missing him 3x, Rob deserved to administer the coup-de-gras. He takes my gun up and sure 'nuff, perfect shot. He unloaded both barrels (his gun is a single barrel, mine is a twin side-by-side) and no more Rocky. Helluva way to start the 4th of July weekend...